Answering the questions that I’ve been asked over the past couple of weeks:

No, I didn’t lose a bet (looking at their hair) did you?

No one’s got cancer, but thanks for thinking I’m that empathetic.

No, it’s not in sympathy with our brothers in arms overseas either…I completely forgot about the sand fleas…Don’t ask me how, I hated them worse than the freaking spiders.

I know it looked okay with the crew cut, but I’m just plain tired of paying over $10 a week for a frelling crewcut done right because the frelling barbers on base can either do a high and tight or they can do a buzz but they can’t do a decent crewcut anymore.

No, it’s not a political statement.

Doc Martens and a bomber jacket? What decade do you live in?

Mostly because I’m going bald anyway, that’s why.

I use my Gillette Mach 3 Turbo. It works, I don’t have to relearn how to shave, and I don’t shred my scalp when I use it.

Yes, I’ve tried the HeadBlade. I don’t much like it, but my son-in-law swears by it. I can’t seem to get the hang of it and like I said, my regular razor works just fine. However, I really like their brand of shaving creme (HeadSlick) and aftershave lotion (HeadLube). That’s right, HeadLube, which comes in both glossy and matte finishes…which cracks me up to no end…and they’re not kidding when they say “glossy.” People at work have requested that I stop using it because of the glare.

One of the guys I work with swears by Schick’s Extreme III disposables and something made for women’s more intimate shaving called Coochy Shave Creme. I shite you not. If the Google Search hadn’t come up with that list, I wouldn’t have believed it myself. He does have the smoothest damn noggin I’ve ever seen.

Yes, it’s still strange to feel a breeze and the sun on bare skin up there.

Boyo thinks I’m weird…but that started the first time he saw his Mom and I dancing to “Smooth” in the living room.

Beautiful Wife loves it.

No, I won’t stick a lightbulb in my mouth, but if you’ve got an extra TootsiePop I wouldn’t turn it down.

Okay…fine…add your favorite bald joke to the comments, get them out of your systems.