Boyo and I took a break from the new house yesterday while Beautiful Wife entertained her very deaf aunt. Nice lady, but a bit proper for Boyo and I.

The Movie Megaplex near our new home is GINORMOUS. It’s got 21 very large theaters and was chilled to the point of discomfort for us in t-shirts and shorts. There were only about 8 people total in the theater. Have to remember that for further summer viewing.

Fantastic Four, Rise of the Silver Surfer was one of my most anticipated movies of the summer. I’ve always loved the Silver Surfer story-line. The Herald of Galactica, forced to search the universe for planets his master can consume. The thought of being able to surf the stars always tickled my imagination. Zooming around on a surfboard through the stars. How cool is that?

The movie? Well, as we like to say around here, Meh. It was good as summer blockbusters go, but that was the problem, it felt like a summer blockbuster: All sorts of annoying product placement. Criticisms of how important news gets buried in tabloid news hype. Scenes from around the world that, while pretty and kind of neat, confused my 11 year old. “Why is the Eiffel Tower in Los Angeles?” It’s not, it’s in Paris, but they’re moving around so fast they’re still talking abut L.A.. Later…”Oh…so the Great Wall of China?” Still in China. “Okayyyyy, where’s that?” That’s Hong Kong, it’s sort of like China, only different. It was just…NOT what I expected. I expected better story.

The effects are wonderful. But I’m used to effects being wonderful. Without a decent story for the effects, I just kind of went, “Yeah, pretty, but ummm, yawn.” The Cosmic Radiation causing Jonny to be able to switch powers got old almost immediately. Knowing that it was going to save the day as soon as it happened pissed me off to no end.

If you’ve read the comics with the Silver Surfer then you already know exactly what’s going to happen. Exactly. There are no surprises.

Like Spiderman III, The Fantastic Four have to deal with not just one problem, but two. I don’t recall Dr. Doom having anything to do with the Surfer storyline, but apparently we have to cram as many villains into a movie as possible these days. Sigh. It didn’t help.

Is it a movie you have to see on the large screen? I can’t say yes. If you don’t have kids who absolutely are dying to see this movie, I’d wait for the DVD. It’s cool. It looks good. I was just very disappointed that the story wasn’t more interesting. Maybe it’s because I read that storyline over and over when I was a kid. My son seemed to enjoy it much more than I did.

Maybe my problem is that I’ve grown up and these stories just don’t do it for me any more.