1. DemoMan: “Oh, and ME? Um, haha, I’m wearing a tactical load bearing vest, a kevlar helmet, an M-4–wait, this won’t show up on my regular phone bill, right?”

2. Cpt Loggie: “yes dear, uh huh, yes dear, yes dear, no dear….yes dear, now thats one loaf of bread and one gallon of milk….yes dear……”

3. Seadog: “Can you hear me now?”

Honorable Mention because I never would have gone there:

Sgt Mom: “Lady, I want ya t’ believe me, when I tell ya this ain’t the $#&*@!! Victoria’s Secret!!!”