27. February 2006 · Comments Off on Memo: It’s Just Business · Categories: European Disunion, General, Media Matters Not, Rant, sarcasm, That's Entertainment!

To: Gary Busey, Billy Zane
From: Sgt Mom
Re: Your Next Career Move

1. I assume, of course, that you will still have one in movies catering to mainstream American audiences. You know, America… that country of which you are both ostensibly citizens? The one where a decreasing number of people with disposable income and an inclination to be amused by well-crafted entertainment at the multiplex are in fact declining to report as commanded by the lords of the entertainment industry to be sliced, diced, insulted and lectured on the most recent cause du jour? Yeah, that country. Feel free, though, to cast your lot in with whoever’s movie industry floats your personal boat… this place is still, although you might get some argument among the entertainment wheelers and dealers, a free country.

2. So, guys, how do you feel, after having participated with apparent glee, in what looks like (from this admittedly distant perspective) the 21st Century’s version of that hateful Third Reich propaganda crap-fest “The Eternal Jew”? Full of that nice warm glow that comes of having stuck it to “the man”, I presume. How very daring of you. I do hope you were well paid, as that paycheck might have to last for a while.

3. So, as working actors…
(“Blondie, sweetie, have we ever seen a movie starring either one of these goofs?”
“Billy Zane was the baddie on “Titanic, Mom.”
“I think he was in “Memphis Belle, too. Maybe that’s where he got to be a pacifist.”
“And Gary Busey… who’s he?”
“I think he played Buddy Holly, ages ago… you do know who Buddy Holly is….?.”
“S**t, Mom, you were a DJ, you trained me well… he was killed with Richie Valens… wasn’t he in Point Break, with Keanau Reeves? Oh-oh-oh-oh… Billy Zane was the the “Phantom”… he wore lavender spandex, for Ch****t sake!”)
It looks like we shall in future be seeing rather less of you two than before… one way or the other— either the free markets’ choice or ours, as consumers.

4. I would also venture a guess, that any future American big-screen production that you have a major role in… will probably not show in an AAFES theater, not once word about this little movie escapade gets around. It’s just a guess, mind you, but I do have an instinct about these things. Military members have a long, long memory about movie actors who either mouth off about the military, or play very prominent roles in movies which defame the military. I know lots of people who have been boycotting Jane Fonda for decades. Of course, that duty was made less onerous when she barely made any movies for decades— interesting coincidence, don’t you think?

Sgt Mom.

PS: Please don’t do any interviews in which you lament the unflattering way in which Americans in general and the American military in particularly, are seen by foreigners… seeing that you just now, and a couple of decades of Hollywood efforts before you have contributed so much to that state of affairs. We owe so much to you all, for generally portraying Americans as brutal, racist, crude, uncultured, ignorant and generally benighted. Thanks for all your sterling service in that regard.

PPSS: Rremember, make that paycheck last!

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