31. October 2005 · Comments Off on On A Catholic SCOTUS Majority · Categories: The Funny

Joseph A. Tranfo a Benedict Blog as this top ten list of changes we are likely to see that the Supreme Court, with its new Catholic majority:

10) Meat-less Fridays all year round in the Supreme Court cafeteria;

9) Oral arguments in Latin;

8) The bones of Chief Justice Marshall will be disinterred and placed in a glass coffin in the center of the Supreme Court bench;

7) Collections between each session of oral argument;

6) Supreme Court windows replaced with stained glass;

5) On close votes, the Justices will consult a statue of St. Thomas More. If the statue weeps, they affirm; if no tears, then they reverse.

4) Incense at the start of each session;

3) Supreme Court opinions will be deemed infallible and unreviewable by any earthly authority [Ed. – Sorry – that does not appear to be a change at all]

2) Catechism of the Catholic Church will now be “persuasive authority”;

And, the number one change which a Catholic majority would make to the Supreme Court . . .

1) Wednesday night bingo!

Hat Tip: David Bernstein at Volokh

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