Ghosts of the personals columns:

A few years ago, I was doing the internet personals gig, And one of the sites I got on to was something of a California phenom, Hot or Not – something of a photo rating site combined with cyber-introduction service.

And it has much to be said for it: It’s quite inexpensive, for paid subscribers; it’s user moderated, and quite modest on what pics or text are allowed; and, truth be told, despite its rather crude matching regime, I had more success with it than any of the other internet dating sites I was involved with. (While we were only talking two or three months here. So the sample size is pretty small.).

Anyway, I never took my pic/profile off the site, and never gave it much thought, until about two/three months ago, when they started an “email your matches” service. And, save for that these people are presumably “in your area,” it is more likely than not that you have NOTHING in common with those whose profile you’ve received.

And for me, that is more likely true than not, as I have little in common with the typical Southern California woman person. Here’s a typical case-in-point:

And what does she have to accompany this (no keywords): “I knew we had to try to look hot but no one said anything about having to write too. Oh good, I’ve used enough letters :)”

Marvelous. I don’t know, hun: One might think, if you were hoping to attract someone above the mentality of a Bonobo Monkey, you could at least use proper sentence structure. And, if you were feeling really adventurous, do you think you might at least mention “Jen and Ben,” (or is it “Ben and Jerry”?) or who murdered whom this week? At least give some indication a few neurons firing.

Whatever – have a good life. California’s prisons are full of your prospective suitors.

BTW: If any of you horn-dogs are interested, just click the pic.