26. January 2006 · Comments Off on Piniata of the Month · Categories: Ain't That America?, General, Media Matters Not, Rant, sarcasm

So, is this Mr. Stein, of the LA Times the designated piñata of the month, for the blogosphere to freely thwack, belittle and otherwise abuse? Now that the joys of flogging “Professor”* Ward Churchill are a thing of the past, we have all apparently moved on. I as usual, am late to the all-blog pile on, since the by now the egregious Mr. Stein has been filleted, sliced and diced by sharper minds and more accomplished writers than myself. I just did not receive the Dark Lord Rove’s latest memo, ‘kay?

*** pouting prettily***

I just must not be on His Darknesses’ primary AIG distribution list. (Quick, can anyone tell me, are we an army of digital brownshirts this month, or just an electronic lynch mob? I hate to be inappropriately outfitted; my jackboots are this very week out being new-soled, but the pitchfork and torch are ready and waiting…. Oh, thanks. Lynch mob it is then… right. Thanks for the light. Non-smokers are always short of a light, have you ever noticed?)

Frankly, Mr. Stein is pitiful meat, after the never-ending buffet that was the many-talented Professor Churchill. The only thing to marvel at is that what used to be a reputable newspaper paid him (presumably a lot of money) for these vapid dribblings. I would rather advise everyone to stand well back, point a finger at him and laugh, long and heartily. Please, for the love of heaven, don’t stuff his email inbox with any more flaming communications. We’re just setting ourselves up to listen to him whine, with lip all a tremble, about those horrid hostile hate-mongers, when all he did was innocently mosey down the lane, excercising his rights of free speech, man!

And don’t, please don’t write a righteously wrathful letter to the Times, threatening to cancel your subscription — even if you are really one of those rapidly diminishing number who actually have a subscription. For the love of all dead fish and bottoms of parrot-cages in the world, something has to serve as wrap and liner! A newspaper is supposed to be representative of the community it serves, after all, and the management just might realize that the whiney, insular yuppie twat demographic is way over- represented in their newsroom/editorial staff, and fire his clueless ass. Thereupon, he would slink off to work for Pacifica Radio, or the sort of extremely judgmental lefty local alternative free paper almost entirely supported by ad revenue from gentleman’s clubs, alternative lifestyle bars and pathetically awful personals… but before he did, we would be treated to Mr. Stein wobbling all over NPR and others as a martyr to free speech. I have a low nausea threshold, and I would far rather keep him where we can point to him and giggle, heartlessly.

After all, he didn’t want to advise spitting on military personnel returning from a war zone. Which, I guess, is progress of a sort.

PS: Cpl/Sgt. Blondie finds it awesomely incredible that he knows no military people first hand. It sort of reminds her, says she, of the kids in her 6th grade class in Ogden, UT, the ones who had never, ever been beyond the state line, or even out of the city limits, and were absolutely boggled to discover that she had been born in Japan, and lived in Greece and Spain for most of her life after that. She advises that Mr. Stein get in his car, and drive south for a little bit, to Oceanside, or San Diego. He will meet a lot of military people there, just by hanging around.

* As always, viciously skeptical quote marks

Later: Problem preventing comments from being posted is fixed. Comment away! – Sgt. Mom

24. January 2006 · Comments Off on Suggested Individualised Service Enlistment Oaths · Categories: General, Military, The Funny

Why, yes there is a difference between services… and the joshing about it all goes on something awful.

But considering that every Army troop I ever served with was so green-eyed envious of the way that Air Force troops lived, I could be serene and gracious… and say..

“Your problem is, you just didn’t talk to the right recruiter!”

(link via Blackfive and others)

23. January 2006 · Comments Off on Adventures With the Lesser Weevil- Pt. 1 · Categories: Domestic, General, Pajama Game

Well, I took the advice about the kong rubber toys last week: somewhat mixed results on that. Lesser Weevil has two of them now, but she keeps misplacing the damned things, once she has sucked the peanut-butter/kibble filling out of them… I don’t suppose there is a clever invention thingy to sort of attach them to her, the way that babies have their pacifiers attached to them by way of a short length of ribbon and a safety pin? No, I didn’t think so. And I think that the peanut butter gives her the trots.

The other announcer at TPR (on duty in the news/information station at the same time that I am on duty in the classical music station) who works as a veterinary technician advises making available those monstrous whole bones, which are sold at local grocery chain, in the pet products aisle. They apparently are cow shin bones, although they look like mastodon bones, something that Fred Flinstone would throw to Dino for a good crunch and munch. She says her dogs take a couple of weeks or so to reduce them to atoms… and they do polish their teeth nicely, as well. We tested this out with something alleged to be a pig shin-bone, which she has been happily crunching away on for the last 24 hours, and seeming to ignore everything else. I have painted everything left in the garden that might be a chewing temptation with a spray-bottle of stuff that is supposed to taste even worse than bitter apple. So we shall see, and now on to the mastodon bone, hopefully before she has quite demolished the current bone to the sub-atomic level. My friend the vet tech and radio announcer says it takes her dogs a couple of weeks to demolish one, and it has the added benefit of keeping their dear little destructive teeth gleaming and shiny white.

The halti-collar, which I bought and tried out this morning, did not work quite as well— she managed to scoop it off her face whenever I slacked off of it. On the other hand, she was not pulling like a tractor at the other end of the leash; it may yet have some benefit in a training situation— not on the morning run, however. This week we were working on the fine technique of walking or trotting on a close-hauled leash, at my knee, which works well sometimes, and at other times only as long as I am chanting, “Heel Weevil, heel, dammit! Good girl, dammit, heel!”, and have the leash doubled around my fist and holding her in position with bodily strength. Perhaps I should just consider this as an upper-body workout—she weighed 47 pounds when we took her to the vet before Christmas, and she has filled out a little since then; say fifty pounds and strong with it. The book about boxer dogs that Blondie bought on sale says that they tend to be very clever, quite willful unless strictly schooled, and very, very powerful for their size.

It is clear from the pictures in the book, though, that Weevil is definitely not within a country mile of pure boxer breed. She has the color, the temperament and the intelligence, but at least half of her genetic makeup is something else, something taller, leggier and leaner. She has an interesting whorl, or cowlick in the fur on the back of her neck, and on occasion, her fur nearly stands straight up, all the length of her backbone— so it does with most dogs, when agitated, but a couple of neighbors have commented that the whorl is a characteristic of Rhodesian ridgebacks… and there are a couple of the breed in the neighborhood, so there is something to make a comparison too.

She is making up to some of the cats: Sammy the Gimp, the three-legged white cat who moved from across the road upon falling deeply in love with Blondie last year, and Percival, the shy and semi-feral little grey catling whom I tamed and moved indoors to a life of privilege the year before seem to be the closest to breaking down and being best buds. She will break down and chase them when they loose their nerve and run away, but they don’t actually seem to be afraid of her. Sammy will sit on the back of the armchair, and Weevil will boldly and repeatedly nudge him with her nose:
“Run! Play with me! Run!”
In response Sammy will bop her on the head with his good paw, claws barely sheathed.
”I do not care to run.”

And this will go on until both of them are quite tired of it. She tries this with Percival, too— Blondie says he nipped her on the ear this morning. Of the other cats, only Little Arthur is hostile: Blondie has observed him stalking Weevil, and she is quite properly terrified of him. Morgie and Henry are magnificently indifferent, apparently feeling that the dog has her place… and it is well beneath their lordly notice.

21. January 2006 · Comments Off on Mawwidge, That Bwessid Awangement · Categories: Domestic, General

Well, yes it is, mostly, for a lot of my friends, my sister and brothers, and most notably my parents. I have always had a deep and abiding respect for the institution, especially other peoples’… especially the marriage of the sort of man who would sidle up to me at the NCO club of a Saturday, and eventually say something like “I am married… but my wife doesn’t understand me. “ To which my usual response was “Oh, I am so sorry, have you ever considered marriage counseling? Why don’t you introduce me to her, I can suggest it.” Those fortunate individuals with a solidly good marriage can count themselves as, well, “bwessid, in that dweam wivin a dweam”, and the not so fortunate rest of us are usually thought to be wistfully pressing our noses against the pure crystal windows of the Castile of Marital Bliss, longing for admission. For the last couple of months no less a person than Maureen Dowd has been publicly and tediously bewailing her single estate and the long string of elgible men left under-whelmed by her “mature” * attractions. Columnist Nora Vincent has even gone undercover as a self-made man, and emerged lamenting the treatment of the average Joe by predatory females of our species; All in all there is a good rousing kerfuffle going on, with much breast-beating about essentially, a “marriage strike”. It appears that modern men (or women, depending) can get all the economic and material advantages (not to mention sex and/or companionship) which used to accrue to the married state, without all the risks and drawbacks… so, ummm… why bother to buy that set of gold rings and schedule that hasty trip to the courthouse? goes the reasoning.
More »

19. January 2006 · Comments Off on On Tee-Vee Tonight… · Categories: Domestic, General, General Nonsense, That's Entertainment!

Three reasons * to watch “My Name is Earl”

1. It’s the ultimate in raunchy, coarse, politically incorrect and insensitivity on broadcast TV…
2. The protagonist is neither a doctor, cop or lawyer…
3. It’s funny, and doesn’t feel the need to wallop the audience over the head with a laugh-track.

* So that adds up to more than three reasons, depending on how you count. This here blog is not the New York Times.

17. January 2006 · Comments Off on Relics · Categories: Domestic, General, Memoir, Pajama Game

One of the first things my youngest brother Sander said to me after Mom and Dad’s house burned in the Paradise Mountain fire, two years and three months ago in Northern San Diego County was “”Well, that solves any dispute between us over who gets what!” Because there is now pitifully little of the “family things”, the accumulation of this, and that, bits of china and knick-knacks, furniture and linens— all those tangible records of our ancestors’ taste and purchasing ability, all those familiar things that were just always there, in Granny Jessie’s or Granny Dodie’s house, or in Mom and Dad’s. When Blondie was still my parents’ only grandchild, and looked in a fair way to inherit the entire accumulation for good or ill, Mom remarked once, “Well, I hope she likes dusting!” Their house had lately become full of things that Pip, JP and I had been used to seeing at our grandparents, in addition to all sorts of things that had always been there— the red Naugahyde upholstered club arm-chair, the India-brass coffee table with the blue iris bowl on it and a fan of magazines and books arrayed around it, the spiky and uncomfortable teak Danish Modern dining room table and chairs, Mom’s wedding-present silver place settings— all those things that had moved from Rattlesnake Cottage, to the White Cottage, to the Redwood House and Hilltop House and their eventual resting place in the house Mom and Dad built together, the house that burned to the ground, all those things reduced to a pile of rubble and ashes, scraped up from the concrete pad by a bulldozer blade and carried away to be dumped… but not before the ashes had been combed and sifted by various volunteers, family members and neighbors.

The house is mostly rebuilt, now— Mom and Dad moved in several months ago, happily abandoning the RV which they bought to replace the one loaned to them by friends. The veranda, and solarium were still incomplete, the area around the garage was still piled with gravel, roof tiles, and squares of terra-cotta saltillo tiles, but the main house was completed, and all the stored furniture (nearly every scrap of it second-hand and gently worn) moved out of where it had been stashed for the last eighteen months… all the linens and clothes, bric-a-brac, bedding and kitchen things put away, and Blondie and I went around for a day, armed with a hammer and picture hangers, and deployed pictures in pleasing and eye-catching formations on certain of the walls. This iteration of Mom and Dad’s house is much more comfortably arranged for visitors, and for entertaining, with a lovely and generous kitchen arranged around a wood-topped central island and stocked with all the cleverest recent developments in storage— a pull-out cabinet with two trash cans, a drawer with a sliding cover for crackers and bread, a shallow drawer especially for cookie sheets and racks, and a spice shelf with an array of smaller hinged shelves tucked inside of it. Clever and ingenious as it all is, we were constantly going to the wrong cupboard for the commonly used things— mugs and silverware, glasses and plates. Invariably, we would first go to where they had used to be, in the house before. What used to be Mom’s studio is now a sort of entryway and secondary living room, which can be closed off with sliding wooden doors to make a second guest bedroom, and the guest bathroom is much larger, with a tall wooden linen closet built in, and a dressing area.

Besides hanging pictures and clearing the last of their things out of the RV, Blondie and I took on another dispiriting chore that I think Mom and Dad just didn’t want to deal with; the last of the remains salvaged from the ashes; six or seven heavy boxes consigned to the shed, filthy with ash and grit from the fire, and disgusting from having been nested in by mice.
Neighbors, friends and family had gone over the site with hope and enthusiasm; some of the things— mostly china, metal and glass— were wrapped in newspaper. Plain white kitchen plates, fairly undamaged, a rectangular enamel casserole which used to be turquoise blue, now it was greenish, and the enamel bubbled and crazed… a set of eight fragile demitasse cups and saucers, the pastel colors of flowers and leaves mutated by fire, but otherwise whole and un-chipped… a little china bulldog chasing it’s tail, also un-chipped but slightly blackened with a deposit of soot and crud from the tarpaper. A silver cigarette case, and a pocket-watch, a little tin box full of cut and unset gem agates, another of coins… about half the pieces from the blue iris bowl, not enough to reconstruct….two handfuls of corroded silver-plate spoons, knives and forks, a kitchen-knife with the wooden handle all burned away. Two irregular conglomerations of smashed wedding china stuck together with melted glass… one of them with the remains of a serving fork imbedded in it. A couple of heavy cut-crystal decanter stoppers, slightly deformed. The antique teapot with the curious lid, an ornamental platter painted with birds on a cactus plant, and a green and blue ewer with a silver-plate lid, not much damaged, as Mom had put them in a bathtub full of water, not realizing that the roof tiles would smash down on top of it all— but at least all the pieces were in one place, and only a little of the soot and tar crud on them. Those three can be repaired, Pip and I will see to it. It was fascinating, in a faintly gruesome way, sorting out what things actually were, and wondering in some cases, how they had survived in a recognizable form.

But all the rest reminded me of nothing so much as the cases of relics dug up from Pompeii, all laid out carefully under glass, with little labels pinned to the fabric on which they lay: the fragile glass and the corroded spoons, fire-blasted pots, with blobs of melted sand stuck to them, the humble and prosaic, the occasional small luxury, all gritty with soot and a dusting of ashes, but more imperishable than memory.

14. January 2006 · Comments Off on Another Brush With History · Categories: General, History, Israel & Palestine, Memoir, Military, World

I had long put it out of my mind, and was only reminded when I ran across this picture at Chicago Boyz… that I actually went to see one of these men speak. For some reason (probably because he had recently resigned from the government) he came to speak at Cal. State Northridge, sometime in the spring of 1975 or 1976, under the sponsership of (I think) the campus chapter of Hillel.

I an fairly sure it was spring, because it was raining cats and dogs, and I was still inexperienced enough a driver to be mildly terrified of the ordeal of driving across the Valley in a downpour, what with the lights reflecting off the water in the road making it hard to see where the lanes were. On the whole the drive was a titch more unsettling than getting into the campus theater was. Each of us lined up to go into the theater— and there was a fair turnout— was patted down, briskly and effeciently, and all the women’s handbags were opened for inspection. Now that was unsettling. It hadn’t been unheard of, that kind of precaution, after all, it was only a half-dozen years after Bobby Kennedy’s assassination, a dozen since Jack Ruby walked into a police station in Dallas and killed another Kennedy assassin… but still.

Even on a wet and unpleasant evening, there were protestors, or course…. practically the only time I had ever seen such on campus with my own eyes… chanting dispiritedly “Palestina! Palestina!” in the downpour that the weather gods save for those who are convinced the sun always shines in Southern California. (There was hardly any campus culture of protest after about 1972, and anyway, Northridge was a commuter school— most students going there had jobs and real lives, and just wanted the damned education, thank you very much.)

I think most of the other people in the audience were, like me, curious and interested… and polite. The person we had come to hear speak was famous, of course, mostly for winning wars— something that our own generals had not lately had much experience with. He had been on the cover of Time, and all. There was an air in the audience of pleasant anticipation, not excitement as if for a rock concert, but more like that in a classroom, when a really rivetingly good lecturer is about to begin. And there were good lecturers at Cal State, and there was a history prof at Glendale JC who was so fabulous that people sat out in the corridor to audition his classes. This man was truely a historic person, well worth driving across the Valley in driving rain to see and listen to.

For a hero, though, he was pretty short, and rather modestly ordinary looking, for all the world like a small local business owner at a Rotary or Lions meeting, wearing a plain tan-colored suit and a wholly lamentable tie. Perhaps I should have looked back in the diary I kept at the time before writing this because I would have written about what he said, because I can’t really remember any of it. But I am good with voices and accents, and they stick in my mind more tenaciously, and I thought it was curious how he spoke English well, but with sometimes a very pronounced accent, alternating jarringly with some words and phrases in perfectly fluent British English— as if he had once spoken English often and comfortably, but not lately, and so become rusted linguistically.

Exept for the eye-patch, one would have hardly noticed Moshe Dayan at all, in that campus theater; he had, I think now with my own experience in the military, perfected the art of putting aside the command presence that a military leader must have in order to lead… but that only the very finest of them can put aside when the occasion demands, and appear to be only ordinary.

(I saw Ray Bradbury lecture once, in the same theater, and remember that he told the story of being arrested for walking in LA, but I think he’s been telling that one for years.)

11. January 2006 · Comments Off on Mere Doggerel · Categories: Domestic, General, Pajama Game

Oh, good lord, after 20+ years of dedicated cat ownership (having freely acknowledged that a cat or cats more or less owned me as their human-hot-water-bottle, their provider of companionship, clean litter-boxes and finest gourmet cat kibble) I have descended—as Morgie, Henry VIII, Little Arthur, Percival and Sammy would see it— to ownership of that lesser form of companion-animal life, a mere dog. Yes, a mere dog, in the form of the Lesser Weevil, chosen for me by Cpl/Sgt. Blondie. Owing to a small spate of petty crime, or attempted crime in my otherwise fairly regulated neighborhood, my daughter issued an edict; that as I generally live alone, I should have either a dog, or a gun. I chose the dog as the lesser of two weevils. Not only is it rather harder to kill someone by accident with a dog, but one of the local patrolling SAPD officers cheerfully noted when asked for his opinion, that he had oftener been chased out of a back yard by a dog than he had been by a gun. The initial expense and upkeep, training and licensing, plus ammunition or food and vet bills may work out to about the same amount, in the long run. And a dog is generally more charming and affectionate… and the Lesser Weevil is all that… charming, happy, affectionate, quite intelligent as dogs go (some of my parents’ dogs were certifiable idiots), and rather attractive… again, as dogs go.

She is mostly and obviously boxer, with a quarter to a half of something else; what that something else might be is a mystery for geneticists, but her resulting general appearance is of a leggier, slender boxer. She is fulfilling the basic requirement of being a watch or alarm dog, in that she does bark at strangers coming to the door, or crossing the green belt too close to the back fence, but displays a pleasingly intelligent discretion in that she does not bark endlessly over trivial or distant provocations, and stops barking once Blondie or I tell her to stop. The bark is evidence of some other ancestry; a deep sonorous bay, reminiscent not of Jengiss-Khan, but something more like a bloodhound or beagle. She is intelligent, in that she has caught on to the concept of “sit”, “stay”, “get in the car”, “behave”, “on the right, Weevil!” and manages mostly to obey, and to not pee inside the house too much… well, only once or twice in the last 48 hours. We started letting her inside the house after we came home from California: she was allowed inside there, and spend nights in the guest room with us, so it was just too cruel to banish her to the yard again.

The cats are handling this thing very well; they have the upper hand inside, and they know it and she knows it. Touchingly, she seems to want them to play with her. I have observed her often crouching down, tail wagging, just inviting them to a romp, but only Blondie’s cat, Sammy the Gimp (who was raised with dogs, albeit much smaller ones!) is interested in accepting the invitation. Percival and Morgie are distantly interested, Henry VIII is just disinterested, and Little Arthur is the only one actively hostile— he snarls, hisses, and makes a barbed one-paw swipe at her at every opportunity. But none of them are afraid of her, really. This evening, she was sniffing at Henry, who was his usual bored and languid self, sprawled half on his back in the hallway, hardly a defensive posture. All he did was bare his teeth and hiss; somewhat crushed, she let him alone. I don’t really think she sees cats as an alien species to her, just some sort of odd, non-barking and snobbish dog, who mystifyingly, do not want to play with her.

And she is a friendly and open-natured dog. Hostility from other dogs freaks her out, and then she displays a overwrought tragic and woebegone countenance that would do Sarah Bernhardt proud. At a rest-stop beside the highway near Ft. Stockton, she was snapped at by a bad-tempered poodle while Blondie had her on the leash in the pet area and I was in the restroom. When I came back, Blondie was sitting on one of the benches, with an utterly distraught Lesser Weevil gathered up in her lap… if Weevil had been a small child, she would have been sobbing uncontrollably.

And lest this seem like an utter paragon of a dog, there are some small considerations to hold against her. The veterinarian guessed her age at anywhere between 6 and 18 months, and at this point I would tend towards the younger end of that sliding scale. She tends to be over-excitable, especially when Blondie and I come home after a time away from the house, and the first half-mile or so of my run in the morning is a prolonged wrestling match with a rowdy puppy, pirouetting like a maddened dervish, until she settles down to a steady reliable trot… there was an accident on the rug not twenty minutes ago… and she chews things. My god, does she chew things. A partial list of casualties so far includes all three pillows off the porch furniture, two of the wooden outdoor chairs, a plastic garden sprayer, one garden hose, my gardening hat (which was practically trashed anyway), the bottom of the trellis gate arch, a bamboo outdoor table with glass top (she knocked it over and the glass shattered on the stone pathway) a rose bush, a butane lighter kept on the back porch to light the oil lanterns with, her own leash, and a pleather handbag of Blondie’s forgetfully left in reach.

My neighbor Judy advises me that this will go on for another year or so; I only hope I have some garden left at the end of it.

08. January 2006 · Comments Off on Operation Jaywick · Categories: General, History, Military, War, World

I had never, ever heard of this particularly daring and creative WWII operation, until I taped a TV mini-series about it all, off Star-Plus when I was in Korea… umm, about a decade ago. Chalk it up to cultural bias and isolationism, since I had always read more about the European side of it, and the bits that American forces were involved in, in the Pacific…still, I do regret that I had never heard much about this operation. Major/Colonel Lyon does come off as one of those who is indisputably mad, perhaps a little bit bad, and definitly dangerous— if not to know, then to follow him into the jaws of death or Singapore harbor under Japanese occupation in 1943-45.
(The miniseries is not, apparently, available via Amazon, although the book that it is based upon is.)

07. January 2006 · Comments Off on Weekend Recipe: Catalan Fish Medley · Categories: Domestic, Eat, Drink and be Merry, General

(Source for this recipe was probably the Stars & Stripes newspaper— I have no idea where they took it, as I copied it out into my own little book of recipes)

Chop finely:
2 large onions
4-5 large cloves garlic
2 red bell peppers
2 Tbsp smoked dried ham such as proscutto, or Spanish jamon serrano

Slice and set aside: 6 Medium tomatoes

Clean and devein: 1lb whole shrimp

Grind to a fine cornmeal consistancy enough shelled almonds to make 1/2 cup of ground nutmeats. Set the tomatoes, shrimp and almonds aside.

Sautee the onions, garlic, and ham in a large sautee pan or dutch oven in 1/2 cup olive oil. (Oil quantity can be reduced somewhat, to 1/3 cup)
When onions and peppers are soft, sprinkle over them:

1 tsp mild paprika
1 tsp hot paprika

Stir and cook for 2 minutes, then add ground almonds, cooking and stirring for another minute. Stir in the tomatoes and bell peppers, along with:

1 crumbled bay leaf
1/8 tsp crumbled saffron threads

Simmer for five minutes, and stir into the pan:

1 1/2 lbs sole, turbot, perch or red snapper filets, cut into 2-in chunks
1/2 cup white wine
juice of one lemon.

Bring to a boil, reduce to a simmer and let cook for to minutes. Add the shrimp and simmer for another 3-4 minutes. Serve immediatly, garnished with fresh parsley and lemon wedges.

It’s good served with jasmine rice. This recipe may be halved, to better suit a small family… and may also be done in a microwave, with everything added in the same order, and nuked appropriatly.

05. January 2006 · Comments Off on Nothing New Under the Sun · Categories: Domestic, General, Media Matters Not, Rant, That's Entertainment!

I really can’t think of anything more trenchant to add to the debate over the West Virginia mining disaster mass-media spazz-out than what Don Henley sang, some years ago.

“I make my living off the evening news
Just give me something, something I can use
People love it when you lose, they love dirty laundry

Well, I could’ve been an actor, but I wound up here
I just have to look good, I don’t have to be clear
Come and whisper in my ear, give us dirty laundry

Kick ’em when they’re up, kick ’em when they’re down
Kick ’em when they’re up, kick ’em when they’re down
Kick ’em when they’re up, kick ’em when they’re down
Kick ’em when they’re up, kick ’em all around

We got the bubbleheaded bleach-blonde, comes on at 5
She can tell you about the plane crash with a gleam in her eye
It’s interesting when people die, give us dirty laundry

Can we film the operation? Is the head dead yet?
You know the boys in the newsroom got a running bet
Get the widow on the set, we need dirty laundry

You don’t really need to find out what’s going on
You don’t really want to know just how far it’s gone
Just leave well enough alone, keep your dirty laundry

(chorus)

Dirty little secrets, dirty little lies
We got our dirty little fingers in everybody’s pie
Love to cut you down to size, we love dirty laundry

We can do the innuendo, we can dance and sing
When it’s said and done, we haven’t told you a thing
We all know that crap is king, give us dirty laundry!”

Well, that and go watch “Network” one more time….

02. January 2006 · Comments Off on On the Road With the Lesser Weevil · Categories: Ain't That America?, Domestic, General, Pajama Game

Among her favorable canine qualities (sweet nature, high intelligence, compact size, overall good health and relative freedom from behavior problems stemming from the circumstances which inspired my daughter to rescue her from a very unfortunate situation) highest among them is the one which became most apparent over the last week or so. That is, the Lesser Weevil is an excellent traveler. She readily jumped into her travel station in the back seat on command and spent much of the journeys of the last three weeks curled up sleeping there, qualities which can best be appreciated by anyone who has gone on a very long road trip with a dog… which if the evidence of my own experience at rest stops along the highways between San Antonio and San Diego this last holiday week are any indication, may include a large percentage of the traveling public. Most of our stops, up and down IH 10 and 8 coincided with those of other travelers armed with leashes, at the other end of which was one of the canine set enjoying a leisurely poop and pee in the designated pet section of the state-designated rest area.

And, oh, how those rest areas were welcomed by the weary traveler. It would be hard for some of my European friends to visualize how vast and how empty the western United States can be, nothing but two lanes of blacktop with a wide median in between, spooling endlessly across a great basin towards a jagged line of distant blue mountains. On either side of the road, nothing much but adobe colored dust, and low scrub bushes… taupe and pale green, pale gold tufts of bunch-grass, dark green mesquite, and saguaro cacti with uplifted branches…. And that is all there is, for miles and miles. The only other signs of human traffic are the other vehicles on the road, coming and going, their lights at night like a sliding string of diamonds and rubies, perhaps a long freight-train loaded with containers moving toy-like in the distance, and a couple of jets scribbling a feather-stitching of contrails in the blue bowl of sky overhead. Only twice did we drive through cities of any size— El Paso and Tucson— all the rest are places like Yuma and Fort Stockton, or even smaller still, like Sierra Blanca and Junction, just a couple of square blocks of houses, and sometimes not even that. We breezed past an off-ramp with the name of a town on it, which seemed to be made up of a gas station, a house and a scattering of rusting trailers, and Blondie wondered out loud what makes a town? Isn’t there some sort of minimum requirement? Or was there once a substantial town which has dried up and withered away in the fierce desert heat? How lonely it must have been for the first settlers, in the late 19th century, to live so far over the edge of civilization. I remembered an account from the wife of one of the early Texas cattle barons— Mary Ann Goodnight, I believe, who came out to live on her husbands’ ranch several days journey from the nearest small town, the only woman for a hundred miles in each direction. One of the ranch hands gifted her with some chickens, and she was so desperately lonely that the chickens became beloved pets, rather than dinners. Driving past one of those tiny, solitary houses or trailers sitting in a small clump of trees fifty miles from the nearest town, I can now understand how that happened.
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31. December 2005 · Comments Off on So….. · Categories: Domestic, General

We’re back. Exhaustive posting to follow, after recovery from 2-day drive along IH-10 and 8 across substantial portions of four western states between San Antonio and San Diego… with a dog. Did we miss anything interesting? Don’t everyone chime in at once….

22. December 2005 · Comments Off on Christmas at Home · Categories: Domestic, General

My daughter and I leave tonight for a long Christmas-time road trip, yet another in a semi-long series— an addition and continuation of the times I drove from Northern California, and from Ogden, all the way south through several climate zones, to spend Christmas with Mom and Dad. But we did more often spend our Christmases together, just the two of us in whatever home we happened to find ourselves in that particular year, establishing our own Christmas traditions— Blondie could pick out and open just one of her Christmas presents from under the tree on Christmas Eve, as long as she left milk and cookies for Santa, we would have anything but turkey for dinner, and for a long run of Christmasses I would give her an enormous and lavish Lego assortment, a castle or a pirate ship, which we would build together on Christmas day

And so a pic from one of those Christmasses, as we prepare for a long road trip.

Blondie, Christmas 1985

Blondie, checking out the ornaments, Christmas 1985, Zaragoza Spain

We’ll be back New Years’ Day— have a lovely holiday and the most wonderful and promising of New Years!

21. December 2005 · Comments Off on The Use of Public Spaces · Categories: Ain't That America?, General, Home Front, Local

Ages ago, when my daughter says that dinosaurs roamed the earth, and I was taking post-graduate classes in public administration, one of the lecturing professors related an amusing anecdote about a project that he had been a part of. I don’t remember in exactly which class this anecdote featured as a lecture motif; one of the sociology courses, or maybe the city planning class, or the basic police-force management class. (I don’t think it was the terrorism class, taught by a U-OK prof whose main gig was to do seminars with law-enforcement professionals wherein he would dress up in a kaffiyah and stopped AK-47 and with a select coterie of his grad students, pretend to be terrorists, take half the class hostage and make the other half negotiate their release.) The lecturer had participated in a study in which a late-model, perfectly serviceable and ordinary automobile was parked on a street in a good part of town, and a similar vehicle parked on a street in a not quite so good part. Both automobiles were being constantly monitored with remote TV cameras and a team of grad students.

The results, said the lecturer, pretty well demonstrated where was a better place in which to leave an automobile unattended; the battery of the car in the bad neighborhood was stolen in 45 minutes flat, and it was stripped of everything detachable within three days. The car in the good neighborhood sat unmolested for two weeks. At that point, the creator of the experiment demonstrated the ‘broken window theory’ and broke one of the car’s windows, making the clear point in the good neighborhood that no one was likely to make a fuss about vandalizing or stealing from it. While such did proceed, it was at a much slower pace than the car in the bad neighborhood, and was terminated when the city stepped in and towed it away as an abandoned automobile, presumably to the amusement of the observing audience.

The subtle point made about the difference in the two neighborhoods, however, is about how we share the public spaces— our streets, parks, civic buildings, highways and beaches. Every time we walk out our front door, we are in a public space, and our behavior in that space is constrained by a number of impulses. The first is a mutual sense of courtesy, and what is appropriate, which is sometimes discovered by offense and rebuke. Several months ago, a householder in my neighborhood put an old washing machine out by the curb for trash pickup, although the bulk trash collection (where the city sends a huge trailer and a truck with a mobile arm to remove heavy items like this) wasn’t due for months yet. Within days, I noticed a stern and neatly printed note taped to the side of the washing machine: “This is our neighborhood,” said the note “Not a Dump.” The errant washing machine promptly vanished, from the sidewalk, at least. The message had been sent, received, and the transgression amended; that this is a neighborhood were residents do not place clapped-out appliances on the curb for weeks or months on end.

We have standards, was the unwritten text to the note, and as a householder, you are not meeting them; which leads naturally into the second constraint, the fear of disapproval by others — a powerful constraint, especially of that approval is valued by the individual. And the third constraint is the impartial but comparatively blunt and unsubtle club of civil law, in the form of the city code compliance authorities, always ready to respond with the force of official law to complaints of this kind of thing. One may poke fun, justifiably or not, at the conformity and insularity neighborhoods and communities like this, but at a very minimum, they are fairly open and accommodating places. The streets and parks are attractive, and most people feel safe, unthreatened, and secure in the knowledge that soft power and civil authority will be respected across the board.

One has only to look at a place like urban San Francisco, where the soft power of community disapproval of certain behaviors has been disarmed, and civil authority made powerless, to see what happens in their absence. There has long been bitter complaining by residents, business owners and tourists about homeless people— often deranged, usually unkempt and aggressively pan-handling, living, sleeping, eating and defecating in the streets and sidewalks—- not exactly what wants to contemplate in an urban vista, even though one might very well feel quite compassionate about the homeless, and generous in rendering assistance. Any sort of organized call to do something about the homeless is met with aggrieved accusations of being anti-homeless, and being selfish and heartless about those poor homeless who have no where else to go, et cetera, et cetera. And that public space continues to be noisome and uninviting; since the problem cannot or will not be fixed to anyone’s satisfaction and those residents or travelers who do not want to deal with aggressive and deranged panhandlers will quietly go elsewhere. Just so do responsible residents of a neighborhood under threat of being overtaken over by drug traffickers and gang-bangers, if neighborly disapproval of such goings on is not backed up by civil law, impartially applied.

I began to write this as a meditation on the Australian beach riots, and then was sidetracked on how the pattern was repeating itself one more time; that of a public space freely enjoyed by a varied constituency gradually turned somewhat less free and un-enjoyable— practically no bathing-suit clad woman really enjoys being threatened with rape or told she is a whore and ordered to put more clothes on by officious and bullying young thugs. After all, there are really only two things that happen when a public space is taken over, and civil law proves to be indifferent or incompetent. Either the residents or the regular users of that space withdraw and give it up to whoever is aggressively taking it over— be they homeless, or gangsters, or whatever— or they attempt to take it back, however clumsily and ham-fistedly. Our public spaces are either ours and everyones�, to be shared freely and equally … or they are not.

20. December 2005 · Comments Off on Progress # 1: The Lesser-Weevil · Categories: Domestic, General, World

Oh, yeah somewhere, someplace, someone is forgiving me for cadging Jack Aubrey’s joke in the movie version of “Master & Commander”, about choosing the lesser of two weevils, in reference to my darling daughter presenting me with the choice of either a gun or a dog as a personal home protection device. I chose, of course, a dog as the lesser of two weevils, over my own misgivings, and the even deeper misgivings of the cats, especially Bubba and Parfait, the visitors who now find their gentleman’s paradise closed to them, for now my backyard is home to… a dog. I put their dishes on the front porch, but they have not been back since yesterday morning, when I returned from my morning run, dragging Lesser-Weevil back with both hands on the leash from chasing them. A couple of miles, and she still has energy and enthusiasm. The discipline will come, and fairly easily, I think, for she appears to be an intelligent and personable dog.

Her qualities are as murky as the circumstances under which she was acquired, from friends of my daughter who were either vague, or unknowing, but this much we have been able to deduce either from personal observation, or from the judgment of an attending veterinarian: She is an un-neutered female (and partial to females, small children, and non-threatening males), is somewhere between six and nineteen months of age. Her adult teeth are grown in, but relatively unworn, her paws and leg bones are in proportion to the rest of her, and the expert veterinarian concludes that she has grown to her adult size and weight (about 45 pounds), and is in excellent health. She appears to be mostly boxer, and lashings of something else, at which can only be guessed; whatever what may be in the genetic mix she is openly friendly with other, non-hostile dogs, and genuinely civil and affectionate to the average non-hostile person. She was actually pretty territorial about Blondie’s car, during the drive from Cherry Point, which bodes well for her assigned profession as a guard or alarm dog.

Lesser-Weevil also— which is good for me and the small yards in the neighborhood I live in— not one of those nervy or terribly bored dogs who barks interminably at any provocation as a hobby. (Her bark is more of a deep, sonorous bay, the sort of thing you can imagine from a bloodhound on the trail) I may have to get a couple of the distant neighbors to walk up to the front door as a test, to see how she handles strangers coming to the door; she is quite calm about Blondie or Judy or I coming up the walk. She sleeps on the back porch, curling up very small, and is ecstatically happy to go out with me for my early-morning run, cavorting and bouncing up and down on her hind legs for about the first half block, until I shorten the leash and then she settles down into a steady mile-eating jog. Three mornings, and she seems to have already grasped that I need a dog that will pace a short distance from my right hand, not tugging or jerking at the leash. Blondie is already working on “sit/stay”, with promising results; the Lesser-Weevil sits and waits, even while you have her full food-dish in hand.

Now, if she would only restrain herself from chewing up everything in sight; she’s already done a number on the bamboo table on the back porch, my gardening hat (well, that was nearly shot already), the plastic lighter I use for the oil lamps, and Blondie’s pleather purse…. Ah, well, things to work towards.

18. December 2005 · Comments Off on 12-Step Program for Recovering Military · Categories: General, Military, The Funny, Veteran's Affairs

(The following was sent to me last month by frequent reader Roy M. Read it, wince and snicker.)

1. I am in the military , I have a problem. This is the first step to
recovery…

2. Speech:

* Time should never begin with a zero or end in a hundred, it is not 0530 or 1400 it is 5:30 in the morning (AKA God-awful early).
* Words like deck, rack, and “PT” will get you weird looks; floor, bed,
workout, get used to it.
* “F *ck” cannot be used to -replace whatever word you can’t think of right
now, try “um”.
* Grunting is not talking.
* It’s a phone, not a radio, conversations on a phone do not end in “out”
* People will not know what you are talking about if you tell them you are
coming from Camp Lejeune with the MWSS platoon or that you spent a deployment in the OCAC

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17. December 2005 · Comments Off on The Lesser of Two Weevils · Categories: Ain't That America?, Domestic, General

So, my dearly beloved and somewhat over-protective daughter has put it to me… given that in the row of about twelve or fourteen houses in which I live contains only three houses (one on either end, and one in the middle) which actually contain able-bodied males (and one of them appearing to fall in the weedy and academically ineffectual division of the male spectrum anyway), and that all the rest contain single women— widows, working single women, divorcees, single parents, most of us of a certain age— and given also that the neighborhood was plagued a couple of years ago by an intrusive peeping-tom (who managed to scare the living ***** out of some of my neighbors), given that someone once tried to jimmy the door of my house with a 16-in screwdriver, and a couple of someone elses’ tried to steal William’s Accura Integra right out of my driveway— and even though this is a really pretty safe neighborhood, with an active neighborhood patrolling scheme… she has laid down the law. I must have either a dog… or a gun. Judy, my neighbor, who lives vicariously through me has been insisting the same thing also (I Know Judy and Blondie have been collaborating on this, I just know it!)

I don’t want a gun, I know there are all sorts of reasons why I should, but I really don’t.

Dad had a couple of revolvers in the house when we were children, but they were kept locked away. I didn’t ever handle anything other than a BB-gun until I had been five or six years in the Air Force, and I never took small-arms training until another ten years after than and threatened with a TDY to the Magic Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. (It was with the standard Beretta. I have small hands, and to me the Beretta was so heavy I had to hold it with both hands to keep it steady enough to even squeeze off an accurate shot.)
But I don’t want to have to think that civil authority has been so degraded, that the soft power of the commune and neighborhood has been so destroyed that having a gun in the house is essential. I don’t want to acknowledge that things have become so horrible that we need to take this precaution. Call me a pacifist wuss, call me a freeloader on all my neighbors who do have guns, call me a starry-eyed optimist… but to have a gun in my house would mean to me that we have descended to the law of the jungle, that the SAPD is useless and ineffectual, that things have gone to the point where we cannot depend on civil compacts at all. I am just not at the point— just yet— where I can do that.

So, I will have the dog. She is very sweet, my daughter says, very well mannered and protective. I can’t begin to imagine how she will get along with the cats. I think I will call her “Lesser-Weevil”… because (to steal a line from “Master and Commander”… she will be the lesser of two evils. Although the cats might have a different opinion, of course.

14. December 2005 · Comments Off on With Apologies to the Silhouettes… · Categories: Ain't That America?, Domestic, General, Working In A Salt Mine...

Sha na na na, sha na na na na,
Sha na na na, sha na na na na,
Sha na na na, sha na na na na,
Sha na na na, sha na na na na,
Yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip
Mum mum mum mum mum mum
Got a job Sha na na na, sha na na na na

Yes indeedy, sportsfans, full and regular employment awaits the lovely and multi-talented Sgt. Mom, as of Friday, 8:00AM…. after three months as a temp mostly at the Enormous Corporate Giant, and pretty well resigning myself to the fact that very few enterprises would be looking to hire new staff until after the holidays… which would mean another couple of weeks after Christmas laboring in the vinyards of the E-C-G.

This whole thing happened as fast as a drive-by shooting, a message from one of the temp services about a possible job on my home phone last night. I called them first thing this morning, from the E-C-G:
“Oh, we really want to put your resume in front of this client…is it still current?”
“Well, pretty much, just tell him I’ve been temping since August for “Insert Major Temp Service Here”.”
“When can you do an interview?”
“Well, I can work with the manager here, and be free on Friday, last thing.”
“Ummm… well, he really wants to have someone start first thing… he’s coming in this morning to interview a possible… could you be here at 11:15?”

This agency is about ten minutes drive away from the palatial premises of the E-C-G, I can kiss off a lunch hour, or a little more, in the service of my eventual economic salvation. The backlong of work I was assigned to expedite for the E-C-G has been accomplished since mid-morning on Monday, and the area manager (a darling and accomplished woman) is very pleased with this, and otherwise inclined to be sympathetic to my quest for gainful long-term employment that does not involve two hours of travel out of my day. (I have better things to be doing with those hours, life being too short to spend them trudging the endless corridors of the E-C-G, or coping with San Antonio’s interminable traffic lights and jammed expressways.)

So, clock out, with the area manager’s best wishes, and allowing ten minutes to get to the VEV and off the E-C-G’s single zip-code encompassing premises, and ten to get down to the agency….

Foiled. The traffic light at a fairly major intersection is not functioning, and I spend the whole twenty minutes I have allotted to travel sitting in gridlocked traffic and fuming. This is the classic nightmare, horribly and embarrassingly late for an important appointment, second only to running in, trailing a length of toilet paper from your foot. I rush into the agency at half past the hour, apologizing and saying to the interviewer,
“I am so sorry… can you please imagine me in a suit, and not panting for breath?”

Fortunately, everyone got caught in the same traffic… and the interview goes very well. Of course, just about every interview I have done over the last five months I think I have done very well… well, maybe not the one where I told the CEO (in answer to the question “What would you do for me?”) “Get you properly organized… and bring in a vacuum cleaner and vacuum this office”. The place was a grubby pit in a warehouse an impossible drive away, and I didn’t really want that job anyway— it would have killed my soul, walking into it every day, with fluff on the turd-colored carpet and waterstains on the suspended cieling tiles.

Well, the agency called this afternoon–I have got the job. Well, that was a welcome surprise…. I shall think of it as my very welcome and most unexpected Christmas Present.

12. December 2005 · Comments Off on A Savory Little Tid-bit… · Categories: General

Right here….

And a tempting taste, courtesy of Rantburg:

Intellectually this same liberal, pampered, and self-indulgent upper class understands that, abstractly, little nuclear Elvis Kim Jong II of North Korea could sling a couple of hundred megatons of radioactive death their way – but on a gut level, where it counts, they can no longer visualize a world where their morning power walks in the dog park could ever actually be interrupted. They have lived for so long under the cool shadow of peace and prosperity that they can’t grasp in a meaningful way the hard reality which is war and poverty, a truth which Tolkien’s work desperately attempts to acquaint us with. They also cannot truly understand the reality of what Saddam Hussein’s now mercifully defunct Iraq was like because they live in a word where acid baths, state rapists, children’s prisons, daily torture, and constant executions are possible only as unwelcome, abstract ideas which only exist when the likes of Colin Powell or Donald Rumsfeld point them out. As soon as that accusing finger moves away, however, POOF! the entire unpleasant matter no longer exists…. and it’s time to go wine tasting in Napa.

Yeah, you probably have to really appreciate the Marin Co. mindset to appreciate.

11. December 2005 · Comments Off on Thinking Outside the Box · Categories: Domestic, General, Home Front, Local

As a place likely to feature in the national news as the site of a horrible civic disaster, San Antonio is pretty far down on the list, rather a comfort for those who live here. It is not on a coast, and therefore subject to hurricanes, tsunamis or landslides. It wasn’t built on a major earthquake fault line, or on a major river: we are too far south for tornados, and too far north to collect anything but the remnants of hurricanes, there are no dormant volcanoes anywhere near. Mother Nature, a temperamental and moody bitch, tends to slam us with nothing more drastic than high winds, hail and torrential rains which, however, lead to sudden and astonishingly fast-moving floods within the metropolitan area. Local residents know where those places are— most of them are clearly marked anyway— but it is a civic embarrassment, knowing that there are places within city limits where it is possible to be innocently driving along a city street and be carried away and drowned.

The very predictability of flooding, though, has the fortunate sidelight of keeping local emergency planners on their toes. A more-than-usually heavy rain will swell Salado Creek out of it’s banks; the Olmos Basin will fill up, the downtown underpass part of I-35 will be impassible, North New Braunfels will run with about a foot of water, and there will be a couple of motorists caught by surprise and having to be rescued by the emergency services— it’s all expected, all predictable. But local disaster preparedness officials and planners have other motivations for staying on top of disaster response planning; as Lawson Magruder of University of Texas San Antonio’s Institute for the Protection of American Communities points out— San Antonio is well situated to serve as a refuge and support area for disasters occurring along the Gulf Coast and the border areas; recently 15,000 refugees from Hurricane Katrina were sheltered in San Antonio alone.

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09. December 2005 · Comments Off on The Chalk Giant · Categories: Domestic, General, History, Memoir

Granny Jessie, tiny and brutally practical, was not particularly given to fancy and fantasies. When she talked of old days and old ways, she talked of her girlhood on her fathers’ ancestral acres, a farm near Lionville, Chester County, Pennsylvania; of horse-drawn wagons, and cows and cats, and how pigs were cleverer than dogs. Of how she and her sister and brother would have to stop going down to the pig-pen early in the fall, lest they become too fond of an animal whose fate it was to be butchered for ham, and bacon, roasts and sausage and scrapple to last the winter through. Of how she played on the Lionville boys’ baseball team, since there were not enough boys, and she was a tomboy and skillful enough to play first-base, and how her grandfathers’ house was once a fall-back way-station on the Underground Railway. (It was the inn in Lionville itself was the main way-station, with a secret room and a concealed access to the woods, or so said Granny Jessie.) It was all very prosaic, very American, a breath away from the Little House books and so very familiar.

Granny Dodie’s stories, even if she did not have a spell-binding repertoire, were touched with fire and enchantment because of the very unfamiliarity of the venue… a row-house in Liverpools’ Merseyside, a few streets away from there the Beatles had come from, where Granny Dodie had grown up the youngest of a family of nine, sleeping three in a bed with her older sisters. “The one on the side is a golden bride, the one by the wall gets a golden ball, the one in the middle gets a golden fiddle, “she recited to me once. “Although all I ever got of it was the hot spot!” All her brothers were sailors or dockworkers, and her ancestors too, as far as memory went. Even her mothers’ family, surnamed Jago, and from Cornwall— even they were supposed to have grafted onto their family tree a shipwrecked Armada sailor. Granny Dodie insisted breathlessly there was proof of this in the darkly exotic good looks of one of her brothers. “He looked quite foreign, very Spanish!” she would say. We forbore to ruin the story by pointing out that according to all serious historic records, all the shipwrecked Spaniards cast up on English shores after the Armada disaster were quickly dispatched… and that there had been plenty of scope in Cornwall— with a long history of trans-channel adventure and commerce—to have acquired any number of foreign sons-in-law. She remembered Liverpool as it was in that long-ago Edwardian heyday, the time of the great trans-Atlantic steamers, and great white birds (liver-birds, which according to her gave the port it’s name) and cargo ships serving the commercial needs of a great empire, the docks all crowded and the shipways busy and prosperous.

One Christmas, she and my great-Aunt Nan discovered a pictue book— John S. Goodalls’ “An Edwardian Summer”, among my daughters’ presents, and the two of them immediately began waxing nostalgic about long-ago seaside holidays; that time when ladies wore swimsuits that were more like dresses, with stockings and hats. They recollected donkey-rides along the strand, the boardwalks and pleasure-piers full of carnival rides, those simpler pleasures for a slightly less over-stimulated age. But the one old tale that Granny Dodie told, the one that stayed my memory, especially when Pip and JP and I spent the summer of 1976 discovering (or re-discovering) our roots was this one:

“There are places,” she said, ” Out in the country, they are, where there are stone stairways in the hillsides, going down to doorways… but they are just the half the size they should be. They are all perfectly set and carved… but for the size of people half the size we are. And no one knows where they lead.”

Into the land of the Little People, the Fair Folk, living in the hollow hills, of course, and the half-sized stairways lead down into their world, a world fair and terrible, filled with faerie, the old gods, giants and monsters and the old ways, a world half-hidden, but always tantalizingly, just around the corner, or down the half-sized stairway into the hidden hills, and sometimes we mundane mortals could come close enough to brush against that unseen world of possibilities.

From my journal, an entry writ during the summer of 1976, when Pip and JP and I spent three months staying in youth hostels and riding busses and BritRail… and other means of transportation:

July 9- Inglesham
Today we started off to see the Uffington White Horse, that one cut into the hillside in what— the Bronze or Iron Age, I forget which. We started off thinking we could catch a bus and get off somewhere near it, but after trying quite a few bus stops (unmarked they are at least on one side of the road) we took to hitch-hiking and the first person took us all the way there. He was an employee of an auctioneering firm, I guess & I guess he wasn’t in a hurry because he asked where we were going (Swindon & then to the White Horse) & said he would take us all the way there. It was a lovely ride, out beyond Ashbury, and the best view of the horse is from the bottom, or perhaps an aero plane. It’s very windy up here, very strong and constantly- I think it must drive the grass right back into the ground, because it was very short & curly grass. We could see for miles, across the Vale, I guess they call it. After that we walked up to Uffington Castle, an Iron Age ring-embankment, & some people were trying to fly a kite-it’s a wonder it wasn’t torn to pieces.
We sat for a while, watching fields of wheat rippling like the ocean & cloud-shadows moving very slowly and deliberately across the multicolored patchwork.
The man who brought us out advised us to walk along the Ridgeway, an ancient track along the crest of the hill, and so we did. It was lovely and oh, so lonely. Nothing but the wheat fields on either side and looking as if they went on forever.
We looked at Wayland’s Smithy, a long stone barrow in a grove of trees & when we got to Ashford, we found the Rose & Crown pub and had lunch. It was practically empty, no one but an elderly couple and their dog, a lovely black & white sheepdog, very friendly. Then we set off to walk and hitch-hike back to Highworth, but we picked the two almost deserted roads in Oxfordshire to do it, because it took nearly forever to get two rides. One got us from Ashbury to (indecipherable) and the second directly into Highworth. Both were women, very kind and chatty; I wish I knew what impulse people have which make them pick up hitch-hikers. What I do know is that the loveliest sight is that of a car slowing down and the driver saying “Where are y’heading for?”

Thirty years later I remember how charmed we were by the people who gave us rides— the auctioneers assistant who was so taken in by my reasons for seeing the White Horse that he decided he had to see it himself, and the two women— both with cars full of children— who were either totally innocent of the ways of this soon-to-become-wicked-world, or had unerring snap-judgment in deciding to slow down and pick up three apparently innocent and apparent teenagers. (I was 22 but was frequently and embarrassingly informed that I looked younger than the 16 year-old Pip, and JP was 20, but also must have looked innocent, younger and harmless.)
With their assistance, we spent a lovely day, in the sun and wind, in the uplands along the Ridgeway, examining the form of a running horse, cut into the turf on a chalk hillside, an ancient fortress, a legendary dolman tomb, and an ancient highway along the backbone of Britain… always thinking that just around the next bend would be the stairway into the hollow hills, and the giants and fair folk of old… Adventure and peril just as Grannie Dodie said it would be in the lands of our ancestors… always just around the corner.

07. December 2005 · Comments Off on A Date Which Will Live in Infamy… · Categories: Domestic, General, History, Home Front, Military, War

In the summer of 1971, when the Girl Scout troop that I belonged to was doing a lovely and frivolous three-week excursion to the Hawaiian Islands, I talked to a man who said he was a Navy vet, and had been at Pearl Harbor on December 7th, 1941. He was, he said, on Ford Island, on a bicycle and on his way to the mess hall for breakfast, when several sorts of heck broke out. And suddenly, everything changed… and nothing was ever quite the same again.
Pearl Harbor, December 7th , 1941….

Arizona Turret

(Turret of the Arizona, taken from the memorial, 1971)

My daughter says she has a new understanding of that… she was on her way to work, the morning of September 11, 2001, at Camp Pendleton, that the whole thing began to develop as she was waking up, in the shower, driving into work… and when she got there, the Marines at her unit were all in the parking lot, listening to their car radios. And that for two or three days, the base was weirdly, curiously quiet.

History… it’s the thing that is happening, when we are on our way to breakfast and have other plans.

05. December 2005 · Comments Off on …There Are Many Mansions · Categories: General

Ogden House

Winter, 1992 — Jefferson Street, Ogden, Utah

Where we lived for two and a half years, upon returning from Spain in 1991. The beauty of Christmas lights reflecting on new-fallen snow cannot be described, not without getting all gushy and purple-prosed.
More from the archives, here and here.

04. December 2005 · Comments Off on Yet Another Reason…. · Categories: General, Technology, That's Entertainment!, Working In A Salt Mine...

….For Sony to reconsider the whole imbedded spyware thing on CD releases; I work a Saturday afternoon shift at the classical music station side of Texas Public Radio. Nearly everything we play… no strike that… it’s everything we play… is on CD. We have a couple of shelves of vinyl recordings, mostly rare opera performances, but the record player in the studio is so far off the schedule of playback machines in use that it’s a special chore to route it through the board, so something on vinyl can even be aired. And the other key thing to know is that everything that used to be played back on cart decks, or on reel to reel tape recorders, is now on computer. Everything in the production studio is edited by computer, programs are downloaded from satellite feeds, stored on computer, and played back for airing… on computer. Even the music library itself is indexed with computer software…. No more cabinets full of little 3 by 5 file cards.

The prospect of taking a recent Sony release into the production studio, and using a selection from it for a pre-recorded program, or one of the staff popping it into the CD drive of their desk computer to review… and corrupting the production and library index on which the whole station depends… well, it is enough to give us all the cold shivers. I’ve been told that the station librarian is not ordering any new Sony classical releases until this whole thing is resolved. Now, there are probably series techies out there who can explain that the chances of this happening are pretty low, that Sony’s anti-piracy spyware couldn’t possibly damage our library and production set-up, and would they even bother doing this with classical releases anyway? But however small that chance would be, we still can’t take it. CD’s with potentially damaging programs hidden in them, versus the security of systems upon which the whole station’s programming depends?

Ummm… not going to happen. And other radio stations are just as— or even more– dependent on library and production software, so I suspect other stations may be considering the same kind of embargo. I wonder if Sony even considered this aspect… it’s not that radio stations buy a lot… but they have a great many listeners, still. I suspect that Sony did not think this one out very thoroughly, or consider secondary ramifications like this one.

03. December 2005 · Comments Off on Another Favorite Cold-Weather Soup · Categories: Domestic, Eat, Drink and be Merry, General

(Again, another wonderful soup recipe from Nava Atlas’ “Vegetariana”)

Potato & Dutch Cheese Soup

Combine in a 4 qt saucepan, and enough broth to cover generously

6 Medium potatoes, peeled and cut in chunks
1 large onion, diced
1 cloves garlic, minced finely
2 bay leaves
2 Tbsp butter

Cover and simmer until potatoes are tender, and stir in
2 Tbsp dry white wine
3 Tbsp. dried or 1 1/2 Tbsp fresh dill
1 tsp. paprika
1/2 tsp dry mustard
pepper to taste

Thicken with 1 Tbsp. flour mixed with water enough to make a thin paste, whisking flour/water mixture into soup, and also breaking up potatoes slightly. Stir in

1 1/2 cup grated Edam or Gouda cheese

Simmer gently until cheese is melted… and enjoy. Like the Lentil and Brown Rice soup, this one is also very good warmed over the next day.

01. December 2005 · Comments Off on 97 Channels…And Nothing On · Categories: Ain't That America?, General, Media Matters Not, Rant, sarcasm, That's Entertainment!

How pathetic is this… with all the riches of the wealthiest nation on earth (supposedly) at our command, and our culture alleged to bestride the known world like a colossus… but there is still not much on the TV broadcast channels to amuse me on a regular basis. The weekly TV guide is beginning to depress me, almost as much as actually having to buckle down and watch the resulting many-times-digested-and-regurgitated pap, piddle and trivia. I am only grateful I don’t work as a TV reviewer, and would have to watch it all, as a condition of employment. But at least, I would be paid for having done so, which would take the edge off, somewhat. Having a lobotomy might also do the trick… might this be passed off as a business expense for TV reviewers?

My local TV listings in this year of our lord 2005 leaves me wondering of this operation has been performed on those who have a responsibility for the programs gracing (if that is the word that can be used) the broadcast channel schedule. It is almost immediately apparent that all originality, creativity, and genius has fled to the cable channels, the ones that are bundled into a package that I can’t … or won’t pay to get, not if they come at a premium. I just can’t justify to myself paying more than 45$ a month for fifty channels, not when I am interested in only watching two or three of them. I think I’ll just save the money, and buy an interesting series on DVD down the road a ways.

But I do have the basic minimum broadcast channels, and oh, what a depressing prospect that is: wall to wall doctors, lawyers and cops… lots and lots of cops. Whatever interesting concept there once existed about any of those has been wrung dry of originality by copy-catting years ago. Old doctors, young doctors… young lawyers, prosecutors (who the hell cast that woman on “Close to Home” as a prosecuting attorney— she looks like a particularly earnest Brownie Scout, not a law school graduate), defense lawyers, private investigators, military lawyers and psychic investigators, crime scene investigators, military investigators…I don’t wanna even think about the CSI episode which aired last week, about the guy who ate himself to death. Who the hell programmed that for Thanksgiving evening? I damn near barfed! Grossing out the audience is not a good long term strategy, although maybe a collection of CSI autopsy scenes might work as a diet aid.

I will give a tiny cheer to “Cold Case”, though… for the really quite expertly crafted excursions into the past. See, you can do different eras quite convincingly on a weekly TV series, how come we are all stuck in the present, which we know all too depressingly well!? And next season, according to Drudge, the flav of the upcoming broadcast TV year is post-apocalyptic America, after some unfortunate series of events. Gee, one wonders if that cheery and disastrous prospect—picturing Middle America all gone to chaos and anarchy—isn’t giving certain coastal elites a woody of sufficient strength and duration to support a couple of concrete blocks and an small anvil. (Note to the bicoastal cultural elites— Middle America is the place where they have guns and tend to know their neighbors. Word to the wise, ‘kay?)

Shit, doesn’t anyone else in TV land have an original, interesting, non-medical, non-legal, non-law-enforcement job? I can’t even bring myself to watch the reality shows: an assortment of people coping with a bizarre collection of real-world and artificial challenges, showing off for an audience and either allying with or backbiting each other— I thought that is what the blogosphere is for. As it is, about the only show where I can’t see plot developments coming a mile away is “Lost”. I just hope that the creators and writers for that show have a seriously planned and mapped story arc in mind, and that all these odd little incidents do have an eventual point, and aren’t just thrown in every week on a whim; weird for the sake of weird, as “Twin Peaks” eventually turned out to be. Like, why the heck does Jack have a seriously military appearing tat, and where is the tree-trampling, air-crew snatching monster these days? I eagerly await any explanation of these matters; secure in the confidence that it won’t be anything I would have worked out already… which is why I keep tuning in, every week.

To see something different, surprising, amusing, unexpected… entertaining, even. That’s what I watch TV for; to be entertained, and not to be bored, insulted or nauseated. And that I am bored, insulted and nauseated on such a regular basis… well, I can only think that perhaps the broadcast channels don’t really want me to watch. And I am happy to oblige. I have enough good stuff on tape or DVD to go for the next couple of seasons. Think on that, major media sources, when you are trying to sell advertising time.