Who Are You? What Do You Want? Where Are You Going? Whom Do You Serve – And Whom Do You Trust?!
Either I shouldn’t have made the “Deliverance” joke or the powers that be at TriCare Dental are much more powerful than I could have imagined, but I just lost a frelling crown. It’s the pretty gold crunky one too dammit. No it doesn’t hurt, I think that tooth has had it’s last day.
Update: Bad news is I’m definitely getting a root canal. Good news is the nerve is obviously dead anyway.
The Venemous One has managed to do a complete number on herself by attempting to eat the handlebars of her bicycle. Those fad diets…glad I don’t go there… She’s lost about eight of her front teeth. That’s right, EIGHT. Tops and bottoms. She’s made the “Deliverance” reference already, as did Day by Day, no reason to (SQUEALLLLL) take that any further that we need to.
But she does need our help. Got a couple extra bucks, GIVE.
Yeah, I KNOW she’s an officer’s wife but she’s never been one of THOSE officer’s wives, she’s cool…no…really…and I’m a guy who doesn’t like officer’s wives just because…
On a side note…don’t you feel better knowing that TriCare Dental can’t manage to work something out when everything goes wrong?
…or is a brand new Mustang sitting in an A1C’s driveway with the vanity license plate “BURNOUT” a pretty sure indication that the youngster is guaranteed a trip to the local OSI?
“”Star” spelled backwards is “rats” and only rats get the cheezes. Stars, they burn out. It’s true…it was in a Neil Young thing.”
I LOVE Melissa Etheridge. No, I don’t think you understand. It’s not the impossible love that some guys have for lesbians because they know there’s just no way in the world it’s going to happen and that drives them nuts and they live for being driven nuts. It’s quite simply her voice and her guitar and the way she knows how to use them. From the first moment I saw her doing “Bring me Some Water” on David Letterman back in the 80s she had me. She’s got that way of grabbing you by the collar of your heart and saying “Ya ready, hang on here we go.” that just makes me grin from ear to ear.
I just downloaded her version of Tom Petty’s Refugee off iTunes and Oh. My. God.
Springsteen once called her his little sister…I think lil sister grew up and is getting ready to leave big brother in his own dust.
Mark Yost of the St. Paul Pioneer Press tells us, “why most Americans, particularly soldiers, hate the media.”
Early Bird version: Why They Hate Us. (Direct access to .mil, registration from commercial domains required.)
St. Paul Pioneer Press version: Why They Hate Us. (Registration required.)
…Why isn’t the focus of the story the fact that 14 of 18 Iraqi provinces are stable and the four that aren’t are primarily home to the genocidal gang of thugs who terrorized that country for 30 years? And reporters wonder why they’re despised.
He has a long list of accomplishments that the press simply doesn’t report. I’ve got a niece on the ground over there as I type this and she’s working herself exhausted getting infrastructure built that was never in place before to help those folks stand on their own. Will I ever get to see her shining face on the nightly news? Nope. She’d have to get wounded or do something stupid first. God forbid we get to see her doing her job and getting things done.
I guess there’s something wrong with my family, we liked it. Boyo’s main comment was, “AWESOME!!!”
No, this isn’t cutting edge Science Fiction, no deep morality play. This is “what if?” And it’s embedded in a LOT of blowing of shit up and things breaking and yes it’s worth seeing it on the big screen because I don’t think anybody blows shit up and breaks things better than Michael Bay and crew.
It’s fun. It’s a ride. No, you’re home theater isn’t going to cut it for this one.
One of the best emails I get on a regular basis comes from Bizarre News. Ever since I first had email back in 1996 I’ve been a subscriber and would highly recommend this weekly to anyone. One of their regular features is Bizarre Holidays:
August is . . . . National Catfish Month, National Golf Month, National Eye Exam Month, National Water Quality Month, Romance Awareness Month, Peach Month, and Foot Health Month
August 1 is . . . . . Friendship Day and National Raspberry Cream Pie Day
August 2 is . . . . . National Ice Cream Sandwich Day
August 3 is . . . . . National Watermelon Day
August 4 is . . . . . Twins Day Festival
August 5 is . . . . . National Mustard Day
August 6 is . . . . . Wiggle Your Toes Day
August 7 is . . . . . Sea Serpent Day
August 8 is . . . . . Sneak Some Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor’s Porch Night
August 9 is . . . . . National Polka Festival
August 10 is . . . . Lazy Day
August 11 is . . . . Presidential Joke Day
August 12 is . . . . Middle Child’s Day
August 13 is . . . . Blame Someone Else Day
August 14 is . . . . National Creamsicle Day
August 15 is . . . . National Relaxation Day and National Failures Day
August 16 is . . . . Bratwurst Festival
August 17 is . . . . National Thriftshop Day
August 18 is . . . . Bad Poetry Day
August 19 is . . . . Potato Day
August 20 is . . . . National Radio Day
August 21 is . . . . National Spumoni Day
August 22 is . . . . Be An Angel Day
August 23 is . . . . National Spongecake Day
August 24 is . . . . Knife Day
August 25 is . . . . Kiss-And-Make-Up Day
August 26 is . . . . National Cherry Popsicle Day
August 27 is . . . . Petroleum Day
August 28 is . . . . World Sauntering Day
August 29 is . . . . More Herbs, Less Salt Day
August 30 is . . . . National Toasted Marshmallow Day
August 31 is . . . . National Trail Mix Day
The downside are the advertisements often in the middle of really good, bizarre, articles.
And to further rock your perception of the universe as you thought you knew it:
NASA-Funded Scientists Discover Tenth Planet
July 29, 2005A planet larger than Pluto has been discovered in the outlying regions of the solar system.
The planet was discovered using the Samuel Oschin Telescope at Palomar Observatory near San Diego, Calif. The discovery was announced today by planetary scientist Dr. Mike Brown of the California Institute of Technology in Pasadena, Calif., whose research is partly funded by NASA.
Anyone know what’s next in the Roman God lineup for naming this thing?
This entry over at Malkin’s place got me thinking about this yesterday and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head.
Our President has told us that “Islam is a religion of peace.” Yet, I have seen absolutely no evidence of that ever. I read a translation of the Koran some 15 years ago and I didn’t grok it then, but understand that even though I don’t like the Catholic Church as an institution, my spiritual base is in the Catholic Tradition with some Taoism thrown in strictly on a pragmatic basis. Taoist are very into, “The universe seems to work THIS way, we’ll go with that instead of making up stuff.” I like that. It works for me.
But back to my point. Can anyone out there point me to any evidence, anecdotes, human interest stories, slices of life that show that “Islam is a religion of peace?” Because I’m missing it. I’m not seeing it. I want to be wrong, I do not want to agree with Michael Graham or Michelle Malkin, and I’m having a very hard time with it. I don’t want to be one of those guys who simply writes off an entire culture but it’s becoming harder and harder with each bombing when there seems to be nothing to counteract it.
And then there’s this bit over at Dr Sanity’s, whom I’m long overdue an appointment with:
I must agree with the author. I DON’T CARE ABOUT ISLAM except insofar that people of that faith want to destroy me, my family, my country and my way of life. For more than 50 years of my life, Islam and I got along famously. I completely ignored it; and praise be to Allah, it completely ignored me.
I know that makes me selfish, self-centered, self-absorbed, but there’s a part of me that’s really pissed off that I now HAVE to care about Islam. I don’t want to care about Islam. I want to care about things relating to MY life and these asshole terrorists keep intruding with “BOOM!!! Hahahahaha, think about Islam you wankers!”
I asked one of the Saudis I knew during Desert Storm what “Islam” meant? What was the translation? He’d been to school in Great Britain and seemed to really enjoy the English Language reading a lot of our classics in English and he loved discussing Mark Twain, especially his short stories. He especially liked “The Mysterious Stranger” and thought that was a great description of Christianity as he understood it. I happen to love that story myself so we had a lot of fun with that one. So WHAT IS ISLAM? He said there was no real English parallel but the closest thing that he’d found was “Islam means submission. Complete, total, with absolutely nothing held back, submission.” Submission to what? To whom? He sort of smiled and replied, “The Mullahs, the Clerics, the doctors of the law. They are the ones who understand the true meaning of the words of the prophet.” Uh huh. I see why you like “The Mysterious Stranger.”
And then we went and ate curry cakes at the cantina.
Mark Twain and curry cakes…okay, so there’s some hope…but man…it’s getting harder to get those two together.
You know the drill. You’ve been tasked to put a team together to solve problem X. You gather your team, you gather your resources, you turn some abandoned old hut into your state of the art workcenter. Staff papers and action papers and point papers are all pooled to study problem X. Meetings are held. VTCs happen once the fiber is run to the old hut. There must be TDYs to D.C., Colorado, Hawaii and Nebraska because it’s that serious a problem…we must discuss face to face this serious serious problem. The discovery that the problem is bigger than it seemed is inevitbale. It’s now problem XYZ and Q(?). Everyone’s got the same problem(s) and teams just like yours are set up at key locations for all the commands. The orignal team disbands due to PCS moves and new people come in. Money is projected out for the next five years to ensure success. At some point a smart airman walks into the office with a magazine article from Wired or Computer News with a simple, off-the-shelf, solution to problem X and quietly tries to implement it, but it’s not to be. A Lt Col on loan from the Reserves and who works with Gigantic Aerospace (GA) n his “real” job knows that GA’s Information Technologies section can do a better, more military, solution and the studies begin anew. Manhours are gauged. Software development begins. The company that first released the off-the-shelf software solution is bought out. Software engineering ensues. Testing happens. Tests are studied. The hut gets knocked down and a new building with not enough power outlets and NO phone lines is built…it will be a couple more years before the comm issues are fixed so the military rents office space from GA. More meetings and TDYs occur. One of GA’s subsidiaries (made up of the original, now retired team members) gets the contract. No, military people won’t be able to use the software, this is now serious stuff with an eclectic and stiff learning curve, we need full time contractors on the job 24/7 and they’re all going to need clearances so we should probably hire retirees or actively recruit folks with a fresh new clearance.
The smart airman watches all of this and spits while he goes back to college, goes for his degree, and gets the hell out to form his own group of contractors that he can sell to GA in a couple years.
And that’s just one of the retention problems we’re having.
…end satirical rant…
Tell us something interesting, funny, exciting, or just plain weird.
Answering the questions that I’ve been asked over the past couple of weeks:
No, I didn’t lose a bet (looking at their hair) did you?
No one’s got cancer, but thanks for thinking I’m that empathetic.
No, it’s not in sympathy with our brothers in arms overseas either…I completely forgot about the sand fleas…Don’t ask me how, I hated them worse than the freaking spiders.
I know it looked okay with the crew cut, but I’m just plain tired of paying over $10 a week for a frelling crewcut done right because the frelling barbers on base can either do a high and tight or they can do a buzz but they can’t do a decent crewcut anymore.
No, it’s not a political statement.
Doc Martens and a bomber jacket? What decade do you live in?
Mostly because I’m going bald anyway, that’s why.
I use my Gillette Mach 3 Turbo. It works, I don’t have to relearn how to shave, and I don’t shred my scalp when I use it.
Yes, I’ve tried the HeadBlade. I don’t much like it, but my son-in-law swears by it. I can’t seem to get the hang of it and like I said, my regular razor works just fine. However, I really like their brand of shaving creme (HeadSlick) and aftershave lotion (HeadLube). That’s right, HeadLube, which comes in both glossy and matte finishes…which cracks me up to no end…and they’re not kidding when they say “glossy.” People at work have requested that I stop using it because of the glare.
One of the guys I work with swears by Schick’s Extreme III disposables and something made for women’s more intimate shaving called Coochy Shave Creme. I shite you not. If the Google Search hadn’t come up with that list, I wouldn’t have believed it myself. He does have the smoothest damn noggin I’ve ever seen.
Yes, it’s still strange to feel a breeze and the sun on bare skin up there.
Boyo thinks I’m weird…but that started the first time he saw his Mom and I dancing to “Smooth” in the living room.
Beautiful Wife loves it.
No, I won’t stick a lightbulb in my mouth, but if you’ve got an extra TootsiePop I wouldn’t turn it down.
Okay…fine…add your favorite bald joke to the comments, get them out of your systems.
One of the small joys of life is knowing that you have to mow your lawn or risk getting a ticket from the lawn nazi, and it’s over 90 degrees outside with over 50% humidity and then a long-haired kid with a mower shows up about a half hour before you were getting your lazy butt out of your recliner and offers to do it all for 15 bucks. I gave him $20, that 30 degree grade in the backyard diving down into a culvert is a pain in the ankles…and dammit, it was just HOT outside. I got a bargain.
Adding to the joy factor was a line of thunderstorms that waltzed their way across our area last night. Okay, so they knocked out power fo a couple hours, but they also dropped the temperature by 30 degrees. I can reset the clock on the microwave all day long.
Yes I really do enjoy being bald. It’s relatively low maintenance because I can shave as much or little as I want, depending on my mood. What’s really fun is adding a particularly oily moisturizer to it when I know I’m going to be someplace where there are people who simpy HAVE to touch it. The look on their faces as they sort of look at their hand wondering what they’re supposed to do next is worth any nick or cut. Seriously folks, what makes it okay to walk up to a bald guy and rub his head? Friends, I don’t mind so much. Lady friends especially. Them I’ll warn. It’s the gals or guys I don’t know so well but act like they know me and they rub my head? I would like to say, “Yes, I just spooged in your hand, that’s what you get.” but I behave…most of the time…it’s me we’re talking about…shrug.
An executive officer asked me yesterday if I was always such a smartass…I paused a moment and asked, “Haven’t ya met me sir?” He smiled and I was dismissed. I love making Marines grin.
What if I don’t want Bill Gate’s frisking me? I swear to God if Apple starts getting any more games at all for their computers, we’re switching. I’m so tired of the arrogance of MicroSoft. “Billions of lost revenue.” That’s hard to swallow coming from one of the richest firms on earth. Check your key codes and get out of my box. …Which would be a really good name for an all-girl punk band… Apologies to Dave Barry.
Have I mentioned Radio Paridise lately? Commercial free, listener supported web-radio. There morning line-up is always pleasant and just enough to get things moving in my skull.
I’m liking the new Harry Potter book so far. No spoilers please. Let’s be civilized.
I’m looking forward to the latest by P.J. O’Rourke, which I somehow waited for to come out in paperback. What a great title for a book: “Peace Kills: America’s Fun New Imperialism.”
Coffee’s done and it’s time to suit up and show up. Happy Tuesday.
…this Monday Morning Rant by Jeff Harrell absolutely cracks me up.
My fellow humans: What. The. Fuck.
Now that’s the way to start a rant. I’m saving that one.
And make no mistake, I agree with it 100%. In my neighborhood in Chicago, you knew you didn’t run from cops. Why? They’ll shoot your ass…and only your ass if you’re lucky.
I’m not as upset about the Egyptian Bombings as I was about the London Bombings. I think it’s because I’m used to terrorist attacks in the Middle East. I hear about an attack there and my mind simply goes, “Sigh, another one?” and doesn’t file it much farther than that.
Blow something up in America or in London, that’s still a surprise.
Anyone speak French? Does that mean what I think it means?
I commented on this post over at Wizbang by Jay Tea earlier today and the thought has stuck with me all day and I think some more discussion is in order:
I think that the average high-school graduate of today is better educated than the men who founded this country and wrote our Constitution and are perfectly capable of grasping the ideas behind it without a lot of external interpretation.
Discuss.
Others:
Rodney goes Wonka and has more linkage.
Kevin’s got someone’s Mom.
….there must be a good reason for it but it just kills me that the shuttle didn’t go up on time because a fuel indicator isn’t working. Shouldn’t it be full before it goes up and empty when it comes down? Too simple, I know, but still, makes me mutter to myself.
This post over at ASV reminded me of something I saw when we were on vactation. I was shopping with our family at the local WalMart and a kid, couldn’t have been more than 17, walked by. It was what he was wearing the threw me. From bottom up: Doc Martin Combat boots, fishnets, an old plaid shirt tied around his waist kilt-like, a Black Flagg t-shirt, a biker leather with an anarchy “A” and Sex Pistols spray painted in white across the back, face made up like Robert Smith and topped off with a black and red spiked mohawk that must have been 8 inches long.
I stared long enough that he turned and said, “What are you lookin’ at?” I shook it off and simply said, “Sorry, but you look almost exactly like a girl I dated in college. Wear’d you find the Doc Martins?” He shrugged, “They were my Dad’s.”
I know it’s weird, but I’m oddly comforted to know that there’s another generation of punkers around.
at least we don’t have to hear or read the words SCOTUS Watch anymore…because really…it just sounds like something you don’t want your Mom catching you doing.
Is there anything on this planet that causes supervisors and department heads to lose their minds faster than a Safety Inspection? Seriously, as a Safety NCO I email bulletins and constantly hammer home the basics at staff meetings and through other emails and that’s been going on for months. The day before and the day of the inspection, suddenly these things are a “suprise” to all and there’s this mad scramble. I’ve watched it for 20 years…still don’t get it. What is so hard about doing the right thing or correcting something as soon as you see there’s a problem?
Update: Jesus Christ on a Pogo Stick people are stupid! Over and over and over and over and over again we talk about the “dreaded” illegal space heater and I swear to all that’s holy we found one illegally set up in almost every freaking office I stepped into! (What makes a space heater illegal and not just stupid on one of the hottest freaking days of the year? If it’s under a desk and doesn’t have 18 inches of clearance and doesn’t turn off when it tips over and doesn’t comply with safety tests that NASA would balk at.)
When your receding hairline threatens to meet your “monk’s circle,” action must be taken.
I blame Gorgeous Daughter and Dashing (and bald) Son-In-Law…but only for giving me the push over the edge. I’ve been threatening to do this for over a year.
Addendum: Some sites for headshavers.
Headshaver.org
All About Shaving.
Bald Men and Women Hall of Fame
Headblade.
And there are a plethora of fetish sites out there, but you can google those yourself.
SciFi announced this evening that they’re running Firefly starting next week before the rest of their SciFi Fridays lineup.
Very smart to run them before Serenity opens.
If they’re very smart, they’ll pick it up again. But these are the people who took Farscape off the air.
This should make the folks over at ASV very happy.
And now that we’re out I read/hear from all over the place that Karl Rove was the guy who told the press about Valerie Plame? Really?
I think the word “slimy” applies here.
Update: I want to be clear. My problem here is that Rove and McClellan looked into the camera and lied to me. I don’t care about the definition of “covert.” That’s like arguing the definition of “is.” I simply don’t like being lied to. Don’t care how much I like you otherwise.