16. April 2006 · Comments Off on Greetings From Rancho Mirage · Categories: Domestic, Letters to the Editor

A friend of mine sent this to me and when I do a search for it I see it’s all over the place already, but I really wanted to post it here for all of our readers too. Ben Stein has been a favorite of mine for years (Bueller? Bueller?) and over the past few years I’ve become even more of a fan. Seems like he feels the same way.

Greetings From Rancho Mirage
By Ben Stein
Published 4/5/2006 2:29:42 AM
Tuesday

Dear Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen, Marines, National Guard, Reservists, in Iraq, in the Middle East theater, in Afghanistan, in the area near Afghanistan, in any base anywhere in the world, and your families:

Let me tell you about why you guys own about 90 percent of the cojones in the whole world right now and should be damned happy with yourselves and damned proud of who you are. It was a dazzlingly hot day here in Rancho Mirage today. I did small errands like going to the bank to pay my mortgage, finding a new bed at a price I can afford, practicing driving with my new 5 wood, paying bills for about two hours.

I spoke for a long time to a woman who is going through a nasty child custody fight. I got e-mails from a woman who was fired today from her job for not paying attention. I read about multi-billion-dollar mergers in Europe, Asia, and the Mideast. I noticed how overweight I am, for the millionth time.

In other words, I did a lot of nothing. Like every other American who is not in the armed forces family, I basically just rearranged the deck chairs on the Titanic in my trivial, self-important, meaningless way.

Above all, I talked to a friend of more than forty-three years who told me he thought his life had no meaning because all he did was count his money.

And, friends in the armed forces, this is the story of all of America today. We are doing nothing but treading water while you guys carry on the life or death struggle against worldwide militant Islamic terrorism. Our lives are about nothing: paying bills, going to humdrum jobs, waiting until we can go to sleep and then do it all again. Our most vivid issues are trivia compared with what you do every day, every minute, every second.

Oprah Winfrey talks a lot about “meaning” in life. For her, “meaning” is dieting and then having her photo on the cover of her magazine every single month (surely a new world record for egomania ).This is not “meaning.”

Meaning is doing for others. Meaning is risking your life for others. Meaning is putting your bodies and families’ peace of mind on the line to defeat some of the most evil, sick killers the world has ever known. Meaning is leaving the comfort of home to fight to make sure that there still will be a home for your family and for your nation and for free men and women everywhere.

Look, soldiers and Marines and sailors and airmen and Coast Guardsmen, there are eight billion people in this world. The whole fate of this world turns on what you people, 1.4 million, more or less, do every day. The fate of mankind depends on what about 2/100 of one percent of the people in this world do every day — and you are those people. And joining you is every policeman, fireman, and EMT in the country, also holding back the tide of chaos.

Do you know how important you are? Do you know how indispensable you are? Do you know how humbly grateful any of us who has a head on his shoulders is to you?

Do you know that if you never do another thing in your lives, you will always still be heroes? That we could live without Hollywood or Wall Street or the NFL, but we cannot live for a week without you?

We are on our knees to you and we bless and pray for you every moment.

And Oprah Winfrey, if she were a size two, would not have one millionth of your importance, and all of the Wall Street billionaires will never mean what the least of you do, and if Barry Bonds hit ninety home runs it would not mean as much as you going on one patrol or driving one truck to the Baghdad airport.

You are everything to us, as we go through our little days, and you are in the prayers of the nation and of every decent man and woman on the planet.

That’s who you are and what you mean. I hope you know that.

Love, Ben Stein

16. April 2006 · Comments Off on Sh-sh-sh-Shaving Cream, Be Nice and Clean · Categories: Air Force, General Nonsense

What happens when you test a fire retardant foam system “for just 15 seconds” and it doesn’t shut off? Apparently you can fill an entire hangar with the stuff. The guy in the photo is about 30 feet up on a scaffoding.

Click on the photo for the entire set over at The Cellar.

via Boing-Boing.

15. April 2006 · Comments Off on Soldier With a Pen · Categories: Media Matters Not

David Paulin writes on Steven Vincent, a freelance journalist who was kidnapped and murdered.

13. April 2006 · Comments Off on Caption This One (060413) · Categories: Fun and Games


(U.S. Air Force photo/Tech. Sgt. William Farrow)

Tomorrow is going to be nuts so I thought I’d give you all an extra day rather than skip another week. Winners Monday morning.

Rodney’s got a Caption Jam Linkfest.

12. April 2006 · Comments Off on PCS(ing) · Categories: Air Force, General Nonsense, Pajama Game, The Funny

We’re literally in the middle of a PCS (Permanent Change of Station) move. We’re a bit more than halfway between where we were and where we’re going. This is my ninth move in 22 years. I hate moving.

Watching all your stuff being packed away and put on a van is distressing. Especially if any of the good stuff you’ve collected over the years have survived previous moves. You wonder if it’s going to make it this time. You wonder if the recliners you finally found that fit your body are going to be crushed out of shape. You wonder if that great cat tree you picked up with your last adopted furball is going to still have all its limbs. You wonder if they understand how much you really like your sound system.

Then there’s the military silliness that goes with a military move. For instance: The quarters we were living in are going to be completely renovated now that we’re out of them. Yet we still had to clean them as if someone was moving in tomorrow. When I say completely renovated I mean they’re going to tear out the guts; they’re going to rip out the plumbing, completely rewire the shorty electricity, trash the cupboards, and put in new floors and/or carpet. Yet still, we had to clean as if Sgt Snuffy was going to move in right after we vacated. It was hard. There’s something about doing pointless labor that kills a part of your soul. Don’t get me wrong, we’ve always left a place better than we found it. We pride ourselves in that. It’s just cleaning that well after sticking our heads into the house next door that’s in the process of being renovated, had us talking to ourselves. I don’t understand why I’m fine cleaning cupboards that are going to wind up in a dumpster as soon as the contractors get to them. A good wipe should have been sufficient.

I’ve been lucky in my career. I’ve always had bosses that gave me a week or two to get all the various and sundry paperwork done. This involves a treasure hunt of appointments around various offices on base that you may or may not have had anything to do with during your stay there. I have no problem outprocessing the library, I use the library. I had a bit of a problem with outprocessing the COMSEC (Communications Security) office. I didn’t have an account. I wasn’t responsible (for once) for any crypto gear. Yet I still had to stop by and have them look in their computer and say, “Yep, you’re right, you have nothing on file.” I asked why that couldn’t have been taken care of with a phone call. Airman Snuffy sort of scratched his head and shrugged his shoulders the way Airmen have been doing for generations. I just nodded. I’ve been through the same ol’ too many times to get my blood pressure up for that one.

Dog tags! Do you know that in the year 2006 you have to have a set of dog tags on your person when you PCS? I don’t think anyone’s asked for my dog tags since 1990 when I went to Saudi. Luckily, to my thinking, not Beautiful Wife’s, I don’t throw anything away. I still have my dog tags from 1990 tucked away in a thick card-stock 6-tabbed mobility folder with ziplock pockets. They’re right next to my last 522 from 1998 when I shot expert again on the M16 using the NATO course of fire (that’s the hard one in case you were wondering, and yes I’m proud of the fact I can shoot straight). Someone tried to tell me where to go to find the office that makes dogtags, somewhere near the flightline, just past and around Wing Safety…what? Why doesn’t personnel make them anymore? “Oh, we contracted that out.” Blink-blink. Because stamping someone’s name, branch of service, social, blood type and religious affiliation into aluminum requires a level of skill beyond the average personnel specialist’s comprehension?!!! Breath, blood pressure, breath. Hell I used to make them in my Orderly Room when I was a brand new two-striper because our unit was so damn big.

Training records. Yeah, those of you who have been paying attention and are in the Air Force know that Master Sergeants don’t need no stinking training records. That’s no longer true…at least not for my career field. Our functional manager decided we were special. (Let the little school-bus jokes fly, I have.) He decided that we needed to maintain our training records until we achieved our nine skill level. I don’t know why. I think he thinks he’s doing us a favor.

All of that got done though and now we’re on the road. I love and hate being on the road. The fact that we’re running I-80 Westbound makes me very happy. Tomorrow we’ll see mountains and buttes and prarie. The fact that Nebraska seems like the widest state in the union makes me crazy. I feel like I’m in a scene from Twister. “Cow.” “Another cow.” “Wait, I think that’s the same cow.” Every town in Nebraska along I-80 seems to be exactly the same as the other. Three exits surrounded by silos. All the silos look the same to me. Mom and Dad would either be proud or disappointed, hard to say.

But there’s an excitement to being in the middle of a PCS. New challenges. New things to do. New people to meet. New weirdness to overcome. New beginnings. This is the part of moving that makes the rest of it bearable. The anticipation.

Yeah, I know it’s going to be the same as any other place, only different, but leave me my delusions, ‘k?

05. April 2006 · Comments Off on Tom Delay and Cynthia McKinney · Categories: Media Matters Not, Politics, Rant

I haven’t written on either of these stories nor was I going to. I find myself with a bit of quiet time this morning and did some surfing around my favorite news sites and blogs. I guess some people think these stories are big deals.

Yawn.

You have a Republican Congressman resigning for charges that he’s been acting like a Chicago Ward Alderman passing out money in the back rooms of pool halls on da North Side. You have a Democrat Congress-Person-Of-Color possibly facing arrest for acting like a spoiled brat and hitting a cop when he didn’t recognize her royal highness. Basically you have two members of “The People’s House” acting as if the rules don’t apply to them and are more concerned with political mileage than they are with serving their districts.

Big noisy stretchy yawn. These are “Dog bites man.” stories getting the “SWOOSH!!! Fox News Alert” treatment.

You want me to become excited about a story about a member of Congress? Tell me a story about how they’re serving their district, saving me tax dollars, using their portion of political power to help a President do the right thing, or stop him from doing the wrong thing.

That would be SWOOSH-worthy.

04. April 2006 · Comments Off on Ron White Has a New Album Out · Categories: The Funny

The title?

You Can’t Fix Stupid.

I just love that.

03. April 2006 · Comments Off on Caption This One 060331 Teh Winnah · Categories: Fun and Games


(U.S. Air Force photo/Senior Airman Rachel Walters)

Rodney Dill: “Man I thought my recruiter said a military career would leave me rolling in dough.”

Punny, very punny.

Suck up Chicago reference goes to Andrew V. for: “It looks like Mrs. Fields is doing her part for the war effort.”

Twist on an old joke goes to Chuck: “Join the Air Force. Travel the world. Meet interesting people. And … bake for them???”

Might see you on Friday, my life is going to be all about moving for the next two weeks.

02. April 2006 · Comments Off on It’s Got a Good Beat, You Can Dance to It · Categories: Ain't That America?, Politics, That's Entertainment!

Bush Was Right!

Via The Headmistress.

31. March 2006 · Comments Off on War Kids Relief · Categories: Ain't That America?, Iraq: The Good, Veteran's Affairs

Jeff Harrell over at The Shape of Days has a great story about one of the Gunners from Gunner Palace who came back from Iraq and couldn’t get the kids out of his head.

After reading the emails from Sergeant Niece and seeing the pictures of her and the kids in Iraq, I can completely understand.

Don’t skip the story, but if you’re short of time, just go check out WAR KIDS RELIEF.

31. March 2006 · Comments Off on Caption This One (060331) · Categories: Fun and Games


(U.S. Air Force photo/Senior Airman Rachel Walters)

Sorry I’m late, it’s been a day. Winners Monday.

More caption blogginess.

OTB.
Wizbang

30. March 2006 · Comments Off on In the Middle of Moving On · Categories: Letters to the Editor

We’ll be rolling out of here in April, heading West for one more go on the PCS-go-round before we finally retire back to Boise. (PCS: Permanent Change of Station for the civilian readers.) Doing the out-processing while moving while figuring out what to do with cats. You know..all that fun.

Inputs from me will be light if at all existant for the next couple weeks.

I’m not particularly sure if I’m coming back at all to be honest with you.

I’m having trouble being associated with someone who would burn the flag in order to express their displeasure over a law. It goes against what I believe on a gut level. I guess I understand it intellectually, but this isn’t about that. If I have to explain it, you probably wouldn’t get it. There are better ways to express your displeasure. Less insulting. More effective. To some it’s just a piece of cloth, to me and mine it’s so much more than that. I can’t get any more succinct than that.

29. March 2006 · Comments Off on Oh No They Didn’t · Categories: Ain't That America?, Domestic

Whittier area students from Pioneer, California and Whittier high schools walked out of classes to protest the proposed federal immigration bill March 27, 2006. The protestors put up the Mexican flag over the American flag flying upside down at Montebello High. (Leo Jarzomb/Staff photo)

Stolen from Malkin.

Ya know, up until this past week I’ve been pretty much for some sort of immigration reform that allows some way for illegal immigrants, especially from Mexico, to become legal citizens with some sort of ease. After seeing the shenanigans going on at the protests and especially after this incident, I’m starting to side with the folks who want to round ’em all up and shove ’em back across the border. Apparently these folks don’t want to become Americans, they’re trying to re-fight a war they lost over a century ago.

27. March 2006 · Comments Off on Caption This One Winner (060324) · Categories: Fun and Games


(U.S. Air Force photo/Robbin Cresswell)

This was difficult since there were so many good inputs this week.

1. Yeff: “Torch Songs and Drag Queens: An Evening with Tops in Blue.” Mostly because I had a roommate who “came home” from Tops In Blue and DAMN, he didn’t have to tell, ya know?

2. Our very own Kevin with: “Gawd, I hope my friends back home don’t see this!” I wonder if making it to the Caption Contest is an additional penalty to the donut offense of having your picture in the paper?

3. Adjustah: The secret life of Wayne Brady…

See ya Friday.

27. March 2006 · Comments Off on Over the Weekend (060327) · Categories: General

The Case Against Abdul Rahman to Be Dropped. Now if he can get out of Afghanistan before the whack-jobs kill him, this would be a good thing.

I keep hearing that most Americans are pessimistic about how things are going in Iraq. It seems that Iraqis are much more optimistic than we are. So American Soldiers who are there and the Iraqis themselves feel better about what’s going on than we do here. I guess we should tell them to start reading 20 Newspapers a day.

And finally, this. just. cracks. me. up.

Many Marines Shun Added Body Armor Because Of Its Weight
By Antonio Castaneda, Associated Press via The Early Bird.

HUSAYBAH, Iraq — Extra body armor — the lack of which caused a political storm in the United States — has flooded into Iraq, but many Marines here promptly stuck it in lockers or under bunks. Too heavy and cumbersome, many say.

Marines already carry loads as heavy as 70 pounds when they patrol the dangerous streets in towns and villages in restive Anbar province. The new armor plates, while only about five pounds per set, are not worth carrying for the additional safety they are said to provide, some say.

“We have to climb over walls and go through windows,” said Sgt. Justin Shank of Greencastle, Pa. “I understand the more armor, the safer you are. But it makes you slower. People don’t understand that this is combat, and people are going to die.”

Staff Sgt. Thomas Bain of Buffalo, N.Y., shared concerns about the extra pounds.

“Before you know it, they’re going to get us injured because we’re hauling too much weight and don’t have enough mobility to maneuver in a fight from house to house,” said Bain, who is assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 6th Marine Regiment. “I think we’re starting to go overboard on the armor.”

26. March 2006 · Comments Off on V for Vendetta · Categories: That's Entertainment!

Great movie. A good time was had by all. Fun special effects. Really great performances. Action, paranoia, intrigue, plot twists, characters with depth that grow through the story. We liked it.

I understand the “R” rating but Boyo was more concerned about the faces in the crowd at the end than he was about any of the violence or gore.

The politics of the movie? Okay look. If my government ever gets as batshit crazy as the one shown in this movie, yeah, I’d say it’s time for a revolution. Until then, I’ll leave the Guy Fawkes mask for Halloween. On the other hand, if you take offense at the way the U.S. is depicted in this film…ummmm, if none of it is true, why does it bother you? (I say that to my 10 year old when he’s mad about someone calling him names.) Be you wingnut or moonbat, repeat after me: It’s only a movie.

I really like the ambiguity of the ending. The faces in the crowd could mean a variety of things and I think that’s a good thing. Made for some good after movie discussion over coffee with friends.

One of the better movies we’ve seen in a long time.

25. March 2006 · Comments Off on All Hail the Dark Lord Xenu · Categories: General Nonsense

No particular reason other than I haven’t annoyed a Scientologist all week and I’m feeling left out.

You know, Scientology is becoming a lot like Islam for me. I would have been quite content had I never heard of it, and what I do hear of it completely creeps me out. Actually, on the creepiness scale, Scientology out-creeps Islam. Islam’s more…anachronistic. You wonder how people managed to get stuck in the middle-ages with Islam. With Scientology, I’m once again reminded of the kids in high school who did too much acid and spent the day chanting “Corn flakes!” and playing with their hands in front of their faces. The ones with the DeadHead T-Shirt and did things with a Frisbee that would freak out the physics teacher? I think they all got straight, grew up, and became Scientologists. Only now they’re even weirder than when they were having their own private concerts in and outside their head during homeroom, shroom, vroom, ba-boom, shadooby…yeah…like that.

24. March 2006 · Comments Off on CAIR Calls for Release of Abdul Rahman · Categories: Good God

The only place I’ve seen this so far is over at Blackfive posted by Cassandra:

“Islamic scholars say the original rulings on apostasy were similar to those for treasonous acts in legal systems worldwide and do not apply to an individual’s choice of religion. Islam advocates both freedom of religion and freedom of conscience, a position supported by verses in the Quran, Islam’s revealed text, such as:

1) ‘If it had been the will of your Lord that all the people of the world should be believers, all the people of the earth would have believed! Would you then compel mankind against their will to believe?’ (10:99)

2) ‘(O Prophet) proclaim: ‘This is the Truth from your Lord. Now let him who will, believe in it, and him who will, deny it.’’ (18:29)

3) ‘If they turn away from thee (O Muhammad) they should know that We have not sent you to be their keeper. Your only duty is to convey My message.’ (42:48)

4) ‘Let there be no compulsion in religion.’ (2:256)

“Religious decisions should be matters of personal choice, not a cause for state intervention. Faith imposed by force is not true belief, but coercion. Islam has no need to compel belief in its divine truth. As the Quran states: ‘Truth stands out clear from error. Therefore, whoever rejects evil and believes in God has grasped the most trustworthy hand-hold that never breaks.’ (2:256)

“We urge the government of Afghanistan to order the immediate release of Mr. Abdul Rahman.”
CAIR

Meanwhile, over at Michelle Malkin we see from the AP/WaPO:

Senior Muslim clerics demanded Thursday that an Afghan man on trial for converting from Islam to Christianity be executed, warning that if the government caves in to Western pressure and frees him, they will incite people to “pull him into pieces.”
…”Rejecting Islam is insulting God. We will not allow God to be humiliated. This man must die,” said cleric Abdul Raoulf, who is considered a moderate and was jailed three times for opposing the Taliban before the hard-line regime was ousted in 2001.

So do “Senior Muslim Clerics” not READ the Koran or is this just one of those things that an infidel wouldn’t understand?

24. March 2006 · Comments Off on Caption This One (060324) · Categories: Fun and Games


(U.S. Air Force photo/Robbin Cresswell)

Winners on Monday.

More Caption Blogginess.

Wizbang.
OTB’s Gone Hollywood.
Sgt Hook.

23. March 2006 · Comments Off on Personal Responsibility Takes Another Shot · Categories: Ain't That America?, Air Force, Pajama Game, Stupidity

I went to Boyo’s TaeKwonDo class at the Youth Center tonight to watch like I do on most Thursday Nights. Beautiful Wife watches on Tuesday Nights. We all enjoy that…for the most part. Other parents with smaller children often-times let their hellions run wild and they get in the way of the class and are generally disruptive. They’ve been talked to. Other parents have tried to calm the offending kids only to be glared at by the parents. It’s no worse than any other place with kids who can’t or won’t behave with parents who can’t or won’t parent, but yeah, it kinda sucks.

Tonight I noticed that there were a few parents in the snack bar and as I entered the gym I noticed there were no parents watching the class in there. One woman who is in the class and acts as a sort of liaison walked up with a letter on letterhead in her hand. She told me that parents were no longer allowed in the gym to watch the class. That was the solution. I found the Director of the Youth Center and told her that I understood, but I wasn’t happy about her solution. She looked annoyed that anyone would question her GS-ness and informed me that it’s ALWAYS been the policy that parents couldn’t be in the gym while class was going on. Okay, myself and other parents have been watching our kids for over a year in there and no one’s ever said a word before this, I knew I wasn’t going to get anything like a straight answer out of this self-important twit. She cited safety concerns and yadda-yadda and I stopped her and asked, “Why not just ban little kids who aren’t in the class from the gym and solve the problem? There’s like four kids who’s parents won’t discipline them, simply ban them.” She looked horrified. “We couldn’t do that, it wouldn’t be fair if we didn’t do it across the board. Besides the instructors can decide on SOME nights that parents can watch.”

Okay, I was done. When they have an across the board hard policy that isn’t an across the board hard policy…

So because a few parents won’t discipline their brats, none of the parents can watch their kids in class anymore.

Crap like this makes me livid. Everything I’ve learned in 22 years of service about responsibility and culpability is trashed at the Youth Center. These are the people who are watching my boy after school. Don’t hold the responsible parties to a standard, simply punish all the parents and kids who want us there watching. The very last thing I expected from any organization on an Air Force Base.

Personal responsibility has always had a decent stronghold in the military, and it’s eroding at the edges.

Set a standard. Enforce the standard. When did this become hard?

The twist of lime to this story is that I found out today that it wasn’t even the brats in OUR class that caused the action. It was ONE kid in an entirely different class. One parent who wouldn’t control one kid completely ruins things for at least a dozen other parents.

22. March 2006 · Comments Off on Abdul Rahman · Categories: Allied Treachery

The story of Abdul Rahman is one that needs to be screamed at the top of our lungs to the highest heavens.

WASHINGTON (CNN) — In the days of the Taliban, those promoting Christianity in Afghanistan could be arrested and those converting from Islam could be tortured and publicly executed.

That was supposed to change after U.S.-led forces ousted the oppressive, fundamentalist regime, but the case of 41-year-old Abdul Rahman has many Western nations wondering if Afghanistan is regressing.

Rahman, a father of two, was arrested and is on trial for rejecting Islam. The Afghan constitution, which is based on Sharia, or Islamic law, says that apostates can receive the death penalty.

Look. I don’t care if he converted from Christianity to Islam, Islam to Christianity, or Church of the Sub-Genius to Scientology. I have a real hard time accepting that a country we “liberated” from the Taliban is still able to legally kill one of their citizens because he’s changed religions.

WTF have we been fighting for if not to do away with this sort of bullshit?

Update: The Shape of Days has news of a rally at the Afghan Embassy on Friday.

21. March 2006 · Comments Off on PSA (Dental Clinic Edition) · Categories: Air Force, Rant

If anyone ever asks if you’d mind if you have an intern for your dentist because your mouth is an “interesting case study,” tell them HELL NO I DON”T WANT AN INTERN. You know why? Because they don’t know how to give a painless pain-killer shot. Four months worth of work and most of my pain has been from the freaking injections.

Mohammed on a mo-ped, don’t they teach that stuff in dental school?

21. March 2006 · Comments Off on WTF, (Weather Edition) · Categories: Rant

Ya know, when you look out the window and you see that the weather and road conditions are worse than they were the previous morning, and they closed the base the previous morning, you would expect that you would see at least delayed reporting for this morning.

You would be wrong.

I’m not judgin’, I’m just sayin’.

20. March 2006 · Comments Off on Attention Weather and News Channels · Categories: Rant

I KNOW it’s the first day of spring.

That’s very interesting.

The fact that I’ve got a freakin’ blizzard outside my door isn’t making me think happy thoughts of crocuses and bunnies though.

Just so we’re clear.

20. March 2006 · Comments Off on Caption This One (060317) Winner · Categories: Fun and Games


U.S. Navy photo by Photographer’s Mate Airman Justin R. Blake

Adjustah: “No, Chief, actually I’ve never been deep sea fishing before. Why do you ask?”

Come back Friday for more caption silliness.

19. March 2006 · Comments Off on SNOW DAY! · Categories: General

With the first and probably last Winter Storm Warning of the season well under way, the probability of the next couple of days being good for nothing work wise is high.

The schools have already decided to close for tomorrow and the worst of the snow isn’t supposed to hit until then.

So…if we do go to work tomorrow it will be delayed reporting AND early release from duty. Oh, and my supervisor will be on leave also.

I don’t know why, but it’s a comforting feeling to know at 2148 on a Sunday night that Monday’s a total washout when it comes to work…almost as good as a bowl of tomato soup and a grilled cheese sandwich.

17. March 2006 · Comments Off on Happy St. Pat’s · Categories: General Nonsense

Take a leprachaun to lunch.